ADULT GIRL

I can let go of the flower, now my power has returned I can look back at the past, now I see what I have learned Try my best to act my age, but the child won't behave She wants to scream and cry and rage, and who am I to dig her grave? The teenage years I never lived The innocence of high school kids Young romance and endless nights Of carefree joy and pure delight Didn't grow up in a normal world And now I'm just an adult girl Now I'm too old to die young, but at least I had some fun Spent my twenties on the run drеaming of suicide and love Think I'm stuck somewhеre between childhood and va-va-voom Always cycling in between existential dread and doom Messy, numb, razors and knives Missed arteries and blacked out nights Kittens, mittens, plushie toys Bows and hearts and sullen boys Robbed me of a teenage world Now I'm just an adult girl An adult girl Someone, tell me how to heal the terror livin' inside me I don't even know what's real, I just know I wanna be free All the things I lost and loved Swept them underneath the rug Like a child, I wait and hope You might repair the things you broke Now I understand the world Of adult boys 'cause I'm an adult girl I'm an oyster without a pearl But that's just how it is for an adult girl An adult girl Adult girl