Town Meeting Song

[Instrumental Into (0:00 - 1:17)] Listen (listen) There were objects so peculiar They were not to be funny All around, things that tantalize my brain, my brain It's a world (world) not like anything I've ever seen And as hard as I try I can't seem to describe Like a most improbable dream, improbable dream Well, you must believe when I tell you this It's as real as my skull and it does exist Here, let me show you this thing It's called a present And the whole thing starts with a box A box? Is it still? Are there locks? Is it filled with a pox? A pox, how delightful A pox If you please Just a box With white colored paper And the whole thing's topped with a bow Bow Bow? But why? How ugly What's in it? What's in it? That's the point of the thing: not to know It's a bat Will it bend? It's a rat Will it break? Perhaps it's the head that I found in the lake Listen now, you don't understand That's not the point of Christmas Land Now, pay attention We pick up an oversize sock and hang it like this on the wall Oh yes, does it still have a foot? Let me see, let me look Is it rotted and covered with gook? Hmm, let me explain There's no foot inside, but there's candy Or sometimes it's filled with small toys Small toys Do they bite? Do they snap or explode in a sack? Or perhaps they just spring out and scare girls and boys What a splendid idea This Christmas sounds fun Why, I fully endorse it Let's try it at once Everyone, please, not so fast There's something here that you don't quite grasp Well, I may as well give 'em what they want And the best, I must confess, I have saved for the last For the ruler of this Christmas Land is a fearsome king With a deep mighty voice At least, that's what I've come to understand And I've also heard it told That he's something to behold And like a lobster huge and red And sets out to slay With his reindeer on carting bulging sacks With his big, great arms And on a dark, cold night Under full moon light he flies into a fog Like a vulture in the sky And they call him Sandy Claws Well at least they're excited Though they don't understand That special kind of feeling In Christmas land Oh well Oh well