Drank a Lot

i drank a lot. i lost my job.

i lived like nothing mattered.

then you stopped, and came across

my little bridge of fallen answers.

i don't recall what happened next.

i kept you at a distance.

but tangled in the knot of sex

my punishment was lifted.

and lifted on a single breath—

no coming and no going—

o G-d, you are the only friend

i never thought of knowing.

your remedies beneath my hand

your fingers in my hair

the kisses on our lips began

that ended everywhere.

and now our sins are all confessed

our strategies forgiven

it’s written that the law must rest

before the law is written.

and not because of what i'd lost

and not for what i'd mastered

you stopped for me, and came across

the bridge of fallen answers.

tho’ mercy has no point of view

and no one's here to suffer

we cry aloud, as humans do:

we cry to one another.

And now it's one, and now it's two,

And now the whole disaster.

We cry for help, as humans do—

Before the truth, and after.

And Every Guiding Light Was Gone

And Every Teacher Lying—

There Was No Truth In Moving On—

There Was No Truth In Dying.

And Then The Night Commanded Me

To Enter In Her Side—

And Be As Adam Was To Eve

Before The Great Divide.

her remedies beneath my hand

her fingers in my hair—

and every mouth of hunger glad—

and deeply unaware.

and here i cannot lift a hand

to trace the lines of beauty,

but lines are traced, and beauty's glad

to come and go so freely.

and from the wall a grazing wind,

weightless and routine—

it wounds us as i part your lips

it wounds us in between.

and every guiding light was gone

and every sweet direction—

the book of love i read was wrong

it had a happy ending.

And Now There Is No Point Of View—

And Now There Is No Other—

We Spread And Drown As Lilies Do—

We Spread And Drown Forever.

You are my tongue, you are my eye,

My coming and my going.

O G-d, you let your sailor die

So he could be the ocean.

And when I'm at my hungriest

She takes away my tongue

And holds me here where hungers rest

Before the world is born.

And fastened here we cannot move

We cannot move forever

We spread and drown as lilies do—

From nowhere to the center.

Escaping through a secret gate

I made it to the border

And call it luck—or call it fate—

I left my house in order.

And now there is no point of view—

And now there is no other—

We spread and drown as lilies do—

We spread and drown forever.

Disguised as one who lived in peace

I made it to the border

Though every atom of my heart

Was burning with desire.

Sunday, March 7, 2004