As Seen On TV

[Verse 1: Jello Biafra]

Another group of monster teenagers shot up their school today

What makes them do it? Video games? Marilyn Manson?

Oh, it can't be the parents, or the fact that school sucks, or that the jocks do get patted on the head every time they beat up the weirdos and the jobs you get once you graduate from school are stupid, boring, meaningless, and a dead-end to insanity

[Chorus: Jonathan Clayden]

I can't deny it's killing me

No one loses on TV

I can't deny it's killing me

No one loses on TV

On TV

On TV

On TV

[Verse 2: Biafra]

When Sport Utility Vehicles are no longer enough, you need The Terminator

Stuck in traffic in Lost Angeles?

Drive over the tops of everybody else

You'll crush 'em before the cops can catch up with you

Your precious artifact child needs to be safe

They're talking to a kid whose skin is a different colour?

Grab the kid and mow 'em down

[Chorus: Clayden]

I can't deny it's killing me

No one loses on TV

I can't deny it's killing me

No one loses on TV

On TV

On TV

On TV

[Verse 3: Biafra]

Each new, hot generation has a statement they wanna call their own

Tattoos? Piercings? That's for Moms and Dads

What you wanna do is spend your allowance on devil horn implants, Elephant Man head, designer tails, third leg, fourth leg Everyone's a hermaphrodite

[Chorus: Clayden]

No one loses on TV

On TV

On TV

On TV

No one loses on TV

On TV

On TV

On TV

No one loses on TV

[Outro: Biafra]

And on a lighter note