Ode to the Bouncer

Ooh, let me in or I'll get physical with you
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical to do

No, I haven't had no dope
Lift up the velvet rope
Mr. Doorman, stop teasing
I'm freezing out here
See, I've got friends inside
It's my birthday tonight
And I'm not wearing trainers
Not to mention knickers
It's futile to debate
With St. Peter at the gate
Made of protein milkshake and low carb intake

'Cause all in all, you're just another prick at the door

Ooh, let me in or I'll get physical with you
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical to do
Bouncer, hey, bouncer
Bouncer, bounce, bounce, bouncer
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical (bouncer, hey, bouncer)

Ooh, bouncer, empowered and aroused
I see it in your trousers
And in the way you browse her
(Look, she's in!)
What? Her dress is up to waterline
Bitch is clearly borderline
Nose as white as Snow White's in moonlight

We stand in awe in front of another prick at the door

Ooh, let me in or I'll get physical with you
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical to do
Bouncer, hey, bouncer
Bouncer, bounce, bounce, bouncer
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical (bouncer, hey, bouncer)
Bounce, bounce, bouncer
Ooh, let me in or I'll get physical
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical

So you can play karate, you thick illiterati
I'm a black belt in life
So go home to your ugly wife
You forgot in your wisdom
The window to the ladies room
A whole new possibility for a cat like me

Ooh, let me in or I'll get physical with you
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical to do
Bouncer, hey, bouncer
Bouncer, bounce, bounce, bouncer
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical (bouncer, hey, bouncer)