Dork Radio

Live

Live 24/7

Dork Radio

<strong>Tonight Alive</strong>: In The Shadows

Tonight Alive are super positive. From the youthful fear they confront on 2011 debut ‘What Are You So Scared Of?, through the pain and struggle on 2013...

Tonight Alive are super positive. From the youthful fear they confront on 2011 debut ‘What Are You So Scared Of?, through the pain and struggle on 2013 follow-up ‘The Other Side’, until the open-eyed tranquillity of 2016’s ‘Limitless’, the band have made a point of finding good wherever they turn.

Leading into new album ‘Underworld’, it seemed the band were out to continue their sunny side up journey. Comeback single ‘World Away’ soundtracked their move onto a new label, giddily looking forward to new adventures and a new trust as they sang of getting to know their pain and it unlocking countless possibilities. “Hope feels shallow to me. This is a song about taking action,” frontwoman Jenna McDougall told Upset at the time.

And that action takes place in their ‘Underworld’. From the first taste of lead track ‘Temple’, Tonight Alive are forced to confront and move. “There are no metaphors in that song, it’s pretty straight up,” Jenna explains. “I’m not afraid there’s no silver lining. Even though it’s empowered, I’m not saying ‘it’s okay’.

“A song like ‘World Away’ is almost the opposite, saying I accept my challenges as gifts, and in each sentence and phrase in that song, it’ll have a negative and a positive, so it all balances out. In ‘Temple’, there’s the lyric in the chorus ‘I could not be more desperate’. That’s my soul speaking.”

‘Temple’ sees Tonight Alive burning red-raw, without the time to find peace in the struggle; there’s nothing but anger, frustration and unfiltered rage. That direct line to what the band is feeling is kept open throughout.

“Once an outcast, always an outcast”

“From a spiritual perspective, the underworld is a realm where your shadow is. Where there’s great light, there’s great shadow. Underworld is somewhere you have to go to do your shadow work. It’s part of you that you revisit, where your trauma and pain from past life exist. I guess it’s about looking in the mirror and getting a little deeper into yourself, into the parts you don’t like, or you don’t want to look at because they’re too ugly or too scary. That’s the underworld, and that’s completely the theme of this record.

“It was a conscious decision that Whak [Taahi, the band’s now-departed co-founder] and I made when we were writing this record. He said people seem to relate when you put it all out on the line, and when you take that risk of being super vulnerable, exposed and honest. People seem to connect with that, and that’s how we connected with our fans in the first place on ‘What Are You So Scared Of?’ and ‘The Other Side’.

“Part of what’s separating our fans from us on ‘Limitless’ was that whole tone; I’ve overcome, and I’ve healed, and it’s finished. It never was. Moving towards light, that was a natural process for me, but I neglected a lot of things that were unfinished. I don’t regret that, it’s just part of the learning process. You have to put some things in the dark and then return to them when you’re ready. You’re not always ready at the time to face yourself. It was a conscious decision to tap back into darkness, and tap back into fear, and give people something to connect to on a level that they relate.” From eating disorders and depression to looking at identity and relationships, ‘Underworld’ sees Jenna at her most open, expressive and bare. No sugar coating or poetry is hiding the pain, just the bloodthirsty truth delivered as small epiphanies and eternal mantras. ‘In My Dreams’ and ‘The Other’ pick up those feelings of not fitting in that the band explored on their debut.

“Once an outcast, always an outcast,” smiles Jenna. “Once a punk, always a punk. In the first verse of ‘The Other’, I talk about looking in the mirror and not seeing a woman but feeling like one. I’ve always had this conflict of masculine energy in me. I don’t know if it’s from childhood, or it’s part of who I am or because I came up in a male-dominated industry but I’ve always dressed in a gender-neutral way, and people always mistake me for a man. That’s fine, I’m not offended by it, but it puts me in a position where I question myself.

“I don’t know how to talk about it properly, but it’s cool to touch on that. I identify as female all the time, but I also have quite a masculine image, I perform with a quite a masculine energy to have dominance but it doesn’t have to be masculine, it’s just interpreted that way. I’m navigating that at the moment.

“That song [‘The Other’] was only written in May [2017]. We always write songs, and I never understand them until a little later on. I wanted to speak on people’s behalf. I need to learn how to talk about it better, but I’m talking about sexuality and gender in that song as well as generally feeling like an outsider or not being understood.”

‘Underworld’ sees Tonight Alive very much in the midst of a journey. “The bridge that never happened between ‘The Other Side’ and ‘Limitless’, both sonically and lyrically,” it’s not an adventure with a beginning, a middle and an end. “It’s not complete. It’s difficult to talk about because it’s not about here’s a question, here’s the answer. Here are the challenges, here are the resolves. It’s not written that way, and that’s probably to do with the fact we wrote the record in three months, and we wrote it this year [in 2017]. What we wrote about, we’re still experiencing now. It’s not resolved.”

Their shadow work has allowed the band to turn towards the light and face it, unburdened. For every song that sees the band face their demons, there’s one about love. “It feels like I got to clear enough space to feel love again, experience love again. There’s been so much pain, personal growth, sickness and battling for control. That was a huge theme with ‘Limitless’ because of the situation with our record label. It feels like we finally got to clear space and open my heart again and be grateful for love. I’ve always had love in my life, but I think the band has always been the focus for so long that I didn’t get to fully appreciate it until now.

“It's about living fully without fear”

‘For You’ is a song about unconditional love, and being in a relationship with something where it feels like anything is possible. “Does it seem like there’s a hidden message on that song? It’s about being in a partnership; it’s about living with somebody and having been with that person for so long, coming to a place where everything is suddenly clear. Wow, you completely changed my life, and we get to share this human experience together. It’s about expressing gratitude to the person you love.

“We don’t have a lot of love songs with Tonight Alive. For a period of time, it wasn’t a focus for me; love. A lot of my adult life has been about my personal development, so it was nice to write that song. ‘Crack My Heart’ is a love song of its own kind, so are ‘In My Dreams’ and ‘Book of Love’. There are so many love songs on this record. They all have different phases.”

Tonight Alive have always turned towards the light, but ‘Underworld’ sees them exploring what lays over their shoulder. There’s a balance to the record; light and shade. “I want people to not be afraid of their shadow and not live in a state of fear. Every decision we make, everything we feel is either from a place of love or fear. I hope this record inspires people to choose love over fear. Choosing love means to stand in the fire, to understand what your dark place looks like and feels like so you have the tools to work with your pain and overcome it and not think that running or sweeping under the rug is a solution.

“Sometimes you need to forgive yourself for doing that because sometimes you’re not ready. Sometimes we don’t feel safe. It’s about getting to know yourself on a deeper level and for me, that’s been through understanding your shadow self. Work is never over. I know that now. There’s no end goal, which is okay. That doesn’t make me feel aimless; it actually sets me free. There’s an opportunity in every conversation and every challenge,” Jenna beams, positive there’s always a positive.

Tonight Alive’s album ‘Underworld’ is out now. Taken from the February 2018 issue of Upset. Order a copy now below.

<strong>Tonight Alive</strong>: In The Shadows

ladylike, Insider Trading and English Garden lead SON Estrella Galicia's free summer Sebright Arms series

Vince Staples has shared ‘Cotton’ ahead of this week’s ‘Cry Baby’ release

The Youth Play celebrate friendship and freedom on their new single 'Sunday'

Static Dress have lined up their biggest UK headline shows to date

<strong>Tonight Alive</strong>: In The Shadows

Related Articles

ladylike, Insider Trading and English Garden lead SON Estrella Galicia's free summer Sebright Arms series

Vince Staples has shared ‘Cotton’ ahead of this week’s ‘Cry Baby’ release

The Youth Play celebrate friendship and freedom on their new single 'Sunday'

Static Dress have lined up their biggest UK headline shows to date