The Knowing

Tears would flow from my eyes and I didn’t know why

So I got down on my knees and just cried

To this day I still see myself in the fetal position on the bed

And I still remember all of the thoughts that were running through my head

And I’d ask him why, I’d scream to him why

But he left me there broken and crippled inside

Why me of all people to be out through this why, and he left me laying there with no reply

That night I felt my whole world die, and I swore that’d be the last time I cried to the sky

And I cut my hair all the way up to my scalp, and I have anger towards her because she did nothing about it

What did she do, she sat back and waited. To the point where every day in my head now suicide is contemplated

And how I would go about it and all the in-betweens, and if my soul would burn forever, or if it’d be set free

I can only imagine the pain that’d be left here afterwards, but that’s nothing compared to the things that I’ve felt. That’s nothing compared to the wound marks on my soul, and maybe it would take for me to die, for everyone who’s affected my life to know

I’ve learned so many things in less than a year, I’ve learned you shouldn’t judge people on the clothes that they wear. I’ve learned that we should accept people for who they really are, I’ve learned that band aids have a good way of covering scars

So before you say something cruel to someone think, how am I affecting this person psychologically. Nobody’s real, not even me. And heaven ain't all you thought it’d turn out to be. They’ll shoot you down if they don’t agree, even if it’s everything you believe