Dogeared

[Intro: Kapwani] La-la, la-la La-la, la-la La-la, la-la My love runs deep I feel so many things [Verse 1: E L U C I D] Losing the plot, turning back the pages Asked if I would trade it all, like please be kind, rewind We're not talking impossible matters, it's all chutes and ladders The patterns never more apparent, glaring Peace scatters after death strokes, next notes Sour to the tongue, alive with pleasure Kelly green and mandarin orange Who I'm is? Who I'm aren't? Everything justified when you starving, right? Hands of chance, buried lambs to not be spotted in darkness, night Twice, thrice, feeling spiteful It's always "Where you going?" And never just "I'm right here with you" (That's fair) Part of keeping your word isn't saying much Three-legged, stray expectation Lapping ankles under shaky tables Change your tone, grab my things, I'm gone I'm off, I'm mostly on If not for you, then who's it for? I still will where I want, I'm okay with nothing That's not my only problem Numbers on the board, another mark in the column, park [Bridge: Kapwani] In front of me, under me Behind me, above me In front of me is what I see Feel me, feel me, feel me [Verse 2: billy woods] She finished her drink and looked at me inquisitively, asking "What's the role of a poet in times like these?" I never answered, but it stuck with me all week Riding the bus, fixing something to eat Putting the kids to sleep, walking the streets at night, burning a tree Drafty windows got me turning up the heat Downstairs neighbor called about a leak Makaela called, we talked til' 3 in the morning My agent called about touring I dreamt of boats loose from their moorings We'll see if they're sea-worthy, we'll see I took the 4 to Fulton, transferred to the 3 We'll see what washes up on the beach Galoshes on, he leaps into puddles with both feet on the way home Bacon grease by the stove for frying eggs, hash potatoes I'm smoking in bed, scrolling my phone Novel on the nightstand untouched Sleight of hand, past moments of dread Spider-Man perched alone on the ledge Mask off like Future Rain sluicing through gutters Lovers searching, the bar is dark Cars double-parked, out-of-state license plates Chin-ups on scaffolding, pull up (What's happening?) She said, "You got an answer for me yet?" I said, "I'm still grappling"