Optimal

I know that it's here to stay But I'm trying to get away through pain Does anything mean anything? But I'm stuck here trying to heal again Not ideal, not your rose colored lens Am I cynical or real again Not ideal, not your rose colored lens I just need to feel alive every now and then I want something to die for so I can love again Scared that I won't be able to look above again And they will all leave Attachment is pain Love is death Loneliness is all the same Please help me find something that makes me feel alive That gives me a reason to not be afraid to die I want something to die for so I can love again Scared that I won't be able to look above again I see the smoke in front of me I feel the warmth again I hope it doesn't kill me 'Cause loneliness will