Vaporub

Kept my heart locked away / Kept it far away from me Found a place by the river where nobody goes Buried far beneath the levee Places where I used to go / When it rained, my heart went deeper Deep blue underneath the sea / Washed away for no one to see I don't have the feelings I'm supposed to know I don't get the feeling that you understand Only get the feeling that you're feeling sorry for me That's never been the point of what i've said Never really knew what love was / Mixed it up with other thoughts Growing up alone doesn't help one sort it out Even when you're here, you're not Never learned to trust another person Never knew a person who could understand my words Why I chose to share them, I will never know, but knowing No one took the time to understand Do I want forgiveness, or the thrill of maybe knowing I could change direction, never caring where I'm going Sometimes all the time it takes to make your destination Isn't charted out as clearly as it seems Now the smell of vaporub comes over me All the shame of weakness builds again Rules and expectations I can't follow any more I became the person that I am Wouldn't want to make you think you haven't found a way to me It's only that it's not as simple as it seems to be