Jacques Cousteau vs. Steve Irwin

Epic rap battles of history! Jacques Cousteau Versus Steve Irwin Begin! Jacques Cousteau, here to spit flow Invented SCUBA, captained the Calypso Palme d'Or winning documenter of the ocean Ready to battle a desperate, sweaty showman You're chunky and soft, you get on my nerves You're the only manatee I don't want to conserve My Life Aquatic was adventure and beauty I'm so cool, Bill Murray played me in the movie I have Oscars! You're in Doctor Dolittle 2 So run back home to your daddy's zoo And just to be clear, 'cause I'm no veterinarian: Were you killed by a fish kids pet at the aquarium? Holy smokes, what a place to go! You'd need a submarine for a blow that low (Awhh!) You'd better run! You'd better take cover! 'Cause crikey, I'm going from croc to Jacques hunter! Have a look at this salty fella His face looks like it's made of pure leather! Look out! He's got the body of a naked mole rat He's cranky 'cause he has to wear a Papa Smurf hat I'm a wild man, you're a subdued sub dude The only crocs you could handle are some slip-on shoes Crikey! You're such a boring guy You could make a whole show about the ocean dry But with the sheilas you sure had fun Your mistress was as young as your first-born son You never shoulda stepped to the wildlife defender Now embrace your French nature and quietly surrender Talk about sons, better watch what you say now You almost turned yours into Outback Mistake House! Would you rather talk about your brother? Ooh boy Nazi! Nazi! Nazi! Oy yoy yoy! Enough of your antics and madness! Contain yourself, like my underwater breathing apparatus You're a joke of a bloke in a tacky khaki romper Go grope a nope rope, Crocodile Humper There's a type of snail, recently discovered And named after you — I'll eat them with butter! Hey Skippy The Bush-League Kangaroo Hold the dee, I'm Crocodile Dun with you! Where ya goin', fella? Hang on a minute Like a Joey in a pouch, this ain't quite finished Take a look how destructive your old films are Silent World? More like Silent Worldstar! If you wanna count fish, please take the reef tour Don't go throwin' C-4 on the seafloor I'm the gold medal rhymer on the podium Cleanin' you up like a Jacques Custodian (Wooo!) I'm Mother Nature's greatest conservationist When I rock the mic, I'm danger! Danger! Dangerous! So go back down under with your crew I just blew through you like a didgeridoo Who won? Who's next? You decide! Epic rap battles of history!