Shaka Zulu vs Julius Caesar

Epic rap battles of history Julius Caesar! Versus! Shaka Zulu! Begin! Iwisa, meet Caesar, he's a commander Who thinks he can dance with Conan of the Savannah But when I go hand to hand with you, I go hammer Knock off his dome, wrap it up in his own banner Send it back to Rome with a message from the Zulu If you battle Shaka, this will happen to you If you cross that equator, you'll head straight into a massacre And get fucked by more than just Cleopatra in Africa You talk a lot of shit for a man wearing a diaper I heard you had poison spit, where was it in this cipher? 'Cause all I hear is threats from a brute with no discipline And I'm ruling over you like a boot full of my citizens And you should take your cow skin shield and hide under it You're fucking with the most triumphant third of the triumvirate I'm first of the Empire and the last of the Republicans And hunting you, accompanied by legions of my countrymen Ask my kidnappers, if I'm just a shit talker Doc J dunk on you like, Boom Shakalaka! So don't go rattling your sticks at me If I wanted to shake spears, I'd waggle my biography Right I've heard of your play, tell me how does it end? Oh yes, you get stabbed many times by your friends So, whatcha gonna do with your Roman swords? When the lines of your legions get gored by the horns Of the Zulu, warriors! Trained on thorns To dismember any emperor's pasty white hordes I got the strength of a lion and the speed of a cheetah And everyone knows you're just a chicken, Caesar Oooh can I be a hyena? 'Cause I'm going to laugh I'll pave roads with the bones of your goat-herding ass First my front lines will drop back and spank you in the chest Then I'll decimate your horns, you can't outflank the best Let your reserves come at me, my ballista's cocked and (Ready!) When I take (Aim!), I always keep my whole crew (Steady!) Because there's no use in murdering you and your heathen You can grow my wheat for me, after you're beaten Who won? Who's next? You decide! Epic rap! Rap! Hooroo! Battle! Battle! Battle! Of history!