I Hate How I Look in My Head

I take off the tight dress I put on my loose sweats I make an excuse and hide in my room And pull up the sheets Don't call me pretty I know that you're lying Look down at my thighs, and I try not to cry 'Cause I'll never be And I hate seeing photos of me with my friends I skip all my meals 'cause I don't look like them I'm breaking down over how I look in my head And I'm scared of you seeing me just for me If I take off my clothes, will you hate what you see? I'm not coming out 'cause I hate how I look in my head Do you know how it feels when you're the invisible best friend And the boys never stare? It's like I'm not even there I might as well be And when I lost all the weight, they didn't ask if I'm okay If you don't eat when you're big You're not thin enough to be sick Too thick skin to bleed So I hate seeing photos of me with my friends I skip all my meals 'cause I don't look like them Breaking down over how I look in my head I'm scared of you seeing me just for me If I take off my clothes, and you hate what you see I'm not coming out, I hate how I look in my head I'm on the floor sitting here naked staring at me And I can't even look myself straight in the eyes And I stare at the photos of me with my friends I wish I could feel just as pretty as them But I'm breaking down over how I look in my head I'm scared of you seeing me just for me If I take off my clothes, will you hate what you see? Said don't come around, I hate how I look in my head I'm not coming out, I hate how I look in my head