ditch

Fuck my life Fuck my health You don't care so I'll go fuck myself Fuck this job Fuck this car And every song that I write just co-exists with a scar And I've got paragraphs about the shit that I will never say 'Cause it'll kill you just to hear me whine and bitch all fucking day Maybe the grass is green in other states where I choose to reside Maybe a glimpse of light will formulate and catch my fucking eye And maybe you'll hear this when you check my page and ask if I'm alright 'Cause I've been afraid of all the darkest places lying in my mind I will convince myself I'm dying but then act like I'm just fine My mind's a scary fucking place and I can't fix it while I drive But my car is lucy in the sky with diamonds going sixty-five And you're just a pothole, maybe Yoko Ono screaming by my side Is this the end of things? I'm strumming strings just trying to decide 'Cause I am afraid of me, so save me, please I beg you just to try I'm losing my purpose, life's a circus They said please enjoy the ride My seat belt is broken eyes wide open As my body starts to slide If I escape the wreck I'll disconnect from everyone online I'll pack my belongings I've been longing for this moment my whole life I'll disappear for months No mentions of my status or a clue I'm fine don't you worry There's no hurry to return to what I knew It's hard to calculate these conversations If I'm being truthful I wanna congregate all that relate To everything I spew In midst of my disconnect I'll stay in check and keep in touch with few As long as I'm open I'm just hoping That it's something I'll get through Cause I'm a fucking wreck Oh, what the heck? Why do I even try? I lie in the grass high off my ass And watch the clouds just pass on by If life has a purpose I am nervous To unravel what is mine I'll trip and I'll travel Down the rabbit hole And ditch my bags inside