4 Your Eyez Only

Yeah For your eyes only (For your eyes) For your eyes only, for your eyes only (For your eyes) For your eyes only Hey Niggas be dying on the daily It seems my dreams faded for far too long, the consequences deadly Can't visualize myself as nothing but a criminal Control the block, serving up rocks and stay subliminal 'Cause young niggas is hard headed, they letting off Full of adrenaline, ignorant to what death can cause Ain't no coming back, family dressed in black Plus it's hot now, the cops outside it's hard to flip a pack And my daughter gotta eat, her mama be stressing me Like I ain't the one who put them Jays on her feet Like I ain't out in the field like that I might be low for the moment but I will bounce back Despite the charges, back to the wall I fight regardless Screaming "Fuck the law", my life is lawless That's what you call it Ain't got to be no psychic to see this is like the farthest thing from heaven This is hell and I don't mean that hyperbolic I try to find employment even if it's wiping toilets But these felonies be making life the hardest Resisting the temptation to run up and swipe a wallet Or run up on your yard, snatch your daughter bike and pawn it That's why I write this sonnet If the pressure get too much for me to take and I break Play this tape for my daughter and let her know my life is on it (For your eyes) Let her know my life is on it (For your eyes) For your eyes only For your eyes, do you understand? For your eyes, do you understand me? For your eyes, do you understand? For your eyes, do you understand me? For your eyes, do you understand? For your eyes, do you understand me? For your eyes, do you understand? For your eyes only You're probably grown now so this song'll hit you If you're hearing this, unfortunately means that I'm no longer with you In the physical, not even sure if I believe in God But because you still alive He got me praying that the spiritual is real So I can be a part of you still, my pops was killed too So I know how part of you feels Maybe you hate me, maybe you miss me, maybe you spite me Life goes in cycles, maybe you'll date a nigga just like me I hope not, I'm tired of dope spots And fiends that smoke rocks I've seen far too many niggas hopes rot I'm writing this because me and the devil had a dance Now I see death around the corner, apologizing in advance Don't know if I ever had a chance At a glance I'm a failure, addicted to pushing paraphernalia But Daddy had dreams once, my eyes had a gleam once Innocence disappeared by the age of eight years My Pops shot up, drug related Mama addicted So Granny raised me in projects where thugs was hanging Blood was staining the concrete Older niggas I loved talked like they was above maintaining a time sheet That slow money, picked up the family business By the age of thirteen, six years later was handed sentence 'Round the same time you came in this world Me and your mama thinking, what the fuck we naming this girl? I told her Nina, the prettiest name that I could think of For the prettiest thing my eyes had ever seen I was nineteen, it took me two felonies to see the trap This crooked ass system set for me And now I fear it's too late for me to ever be The one that set examples that was never set for me I'm living fast, but not fast enough 'cause karma keeps catching up to me And if my past becomes the death of me, I hope you understand For your eyes, do you understand? For your eyes, do you understand me? For your eyes, do you understand? For your eyes, do you understand me? For your eyes, do you understand? For your eyes, do you understand me? For your eyes, do you understand? For your eyes only In several ways I could've went out, too many to count Was it the trigger happy crackers that the badges give clout? Was it the young nigga, blasting frustrated 'cause the cash running out? Niggas don't know how to act in a drought See baby girl I realized, my definition of a real nigga was skewed My views misshaped by new mixtapes That confirmed the shit I learned from in the streets was true That real niggas don't speak when they beef with you They just pull up on your street, let the heat achoo And if a real nigga hungry he gon' eat your food I was a fool, spent all my time ducking school, ducking cops Ducking rules, hugging blocks that don't love you I pray you find a nigga with goals and point of views Much broader than the corner, if not it's gon' corner you Into a box, where your son don't even know his pops And the cyclical nature of doing time continues My worst fear is one day that you come home from school And see your father face while hearing 'bout tragedy on news I got the strangest feeling your Daddy gonna lose his life soon And sadly if you're listening now it must mean it's true But maybe there's a chance that it's not And this album remains locked in a hard drive like valuable jewels And I can teach you this in person like I'm teaching you to tie your own shoes I love you and I hope to God I don't lose you For your eyes only For your eyes For your eyes only For your eyes For your eyes only For your eyes do you understand? For your eyes only One day your daddy called me, told me he had a funny feeling What he'd been dealing with lately, he wasn't telling I tried to pick his brains, still he wasn't revealing But I could feel the sense of panic in his voice and it was chilling He said "Jermaine, I knew you since we was children I never asked for nothing When times was hard I never had discussions with you begging you to help me I dealt with the repercussions of my actions I know you tried to steer me away from that shit But that shit was in my blood, you know my life I know your momma nigga, send my love In case I never get a chance to speak again I won't forget the weekends spent sleeping at your crib That's the way I wished my family lived But my granny crib was in the 'jects I had to interject like, "Nigga what you talking 'bout? Fuck is you getting at?" He said "Listen, I got no time to dive into descriptions But I've been having premonitions, just call it visions from the other side I got a feeling I won't see tomorrow, like the time I'm living on is borrowed With that said I'm proud to say I was a father Write my story down and if I pass go play it for my daughter when she ready And so I'm leaving you this record for your eyes only Don't you ever scratch or disrespect it This perspective is a real one, another lost Ville son I dedicate these words to you and all the other children Affected by all the mass incarceration in this nation That sent your pops to prison when he needed education Sometimes I think this segregation would've done us better Although that means that I would never be brought into this world 'Cause my daddy was so thrilled when he found him a white girl To take back to Jonesborough with Little Zach and Cole World Barely one years old, now it's thirty years later making sure the story's told Girl your daddy was a real nigga, not 'cause he was cold Not because he was the first to get some pussy twelve years old Not because he used to come through in the Caddy on some vogues Not 'cause he went from bagging up them grams to serving Os Now your daddy was a real nigga, not 'cos he was hard Not because he lived a life of crime and sat behind some bars Not because he screamed fuck the law, although that was true Your daddy was a real nigga 'cause he loved you" For your eyes only