Blame Game

[Verse 1: Jon Connor] On a bathroom wall I wrote "I'd rather argue with you than be with someone else" I took a piss and dismiss it like "fuck it" And I went and found somebody else Fuck arguing and harvesting the feelings Yo, I'd rather be by my fucking self Till about two a.m. and I call back And I hang up and I start to blame myself Somebody help... You used to cry cause both your parents was addicts and your sister was ratchet So I made it my mission to get you up out of that shit Probably my fault for trying to be a hero when I can't be Or your fault for sending me DM's that said "Save me" Shit I was trying, I know that we been had some ups and downs At Xzibit house, found out you and some nigga fucking now Lied and said you told him about us and that he don't mess with you Well if ya'll ain't fucking, why the fuck this nigga texting you While you was sleeping I'd go and pick up your phone And said "babe is you okay? And let me know when you coming home" So I put you on a plane like I'm done with you I fly back to Flint and I'm back in the back of the whip choking and fucking you I know you ain't getting this type of dick from that local dude You was running game on me like this nigga was coaching you I'm fucking girls over while you was fucking some other dude In the beginning saw something in you, but that just wasn't you Love no cost a thing, and that's why I wouldn't cheat Western Union every week so you and your daughters could eat Western Union every week so you and your kids could sleep On a bed while your sister would throw you out on the street Thought if I showed you California and the shit that I was doing with the music You would stop being so motherfucking stupid I wouldn't try to buy you, I tried to be by you Wanted you and the girls to have a fucking better life too Came home for Christmas, I think it was on a Friday Drive to your crib, homies’ car was already in the driveway I walked to the door, my future flashed before my eyes I'm finally signed and I'm about to give it up over pride See I just left Hawaii and now I'm standing in the hood arguing with a nigga over a bitch I was calling wifey This nigga stood in front of you and said you was his side bitch, you still behind that nigga he looking at me like that's my bitch Wanted to spazz, but we in somebody else's home She kept telling me to leave cause she was already gone 1000 dollars in an envelope you can have it I made sure you had it, even if I ain't had shit Always said "Jon we're living too different lives" Ain't know that's an excuse for you fucking two different guys Outer beauty never hides the ugliness that's inside Memories haunt my mind, but all I know is that I tried Told you I'd leave you alone if you was really in love with him We could never work cause you ain't never stop fucking him It all was a lie, regardless of how I felt Now I see you for who you are, can't do nothing but blame myself For Real..