Let Me Be Alone

Feel like I shouldn’t talk about the knives or the guns When they can't even serve water in the schools where I'm from Sometimes late at nite I think “what the fuck am I doing?” Its like the better I become at this music The worse I get at being human Meanwhile I try act normal Try and go through the motions When in reality I'm just waiting to saw someones chest open They say I'm lucky for the opportunities that I've had But I believe I paid in full for these so just try and understand The Truth is I hate the shows Truth is I hate the road I hate my face and my voice and my name they seem to know And had I known it would turn out like this I wouldn't have fought for my life I would’ve laid there in my piss When they shot me and they stabbed me I wouldn't have tried to walk I would’ve laid there and bled and went to god and had that talk I would’ve never crawled home to tell my friend I had been shot And had him help me through it whether he wanted to or not Years later the very same friend cut his throat Did I help him like he helped me truth is I don't know They said a millimeter deeper neither of us would’ve made it And it makes me think of us playing as kids and how our days went And his dad raised us both so its kind of like were brothers While he sits at home and kills himself I'm out here killing others Now his dad has passed away so no one keeps us in line I wish I could bring him back I wish the lord had taken mine I remember how we met I saw you shoot that kid I didn't like him, didn't help him but you didn't know if I did Investigated for the shooting and I never told em nothin So you made me go on a mission to make sure I could be trusted You gave me that gun and I shot at everybody From then on it was us up against anybody Years later you told me you had came back to kill me And you don't know what told you not to but you just had a feeling Know I still remember all the crazy things we did Know I fall apart when I see your kid Got your name on my wrist where the hand cuffs are placed I pray that you protect me every time I'm in the cage Your kid's mother hates me cuz that was my gun And you did the time for me even though you had a son My responsibility to anyone else means nothing I see your killer out in public I'll shoot him in front of his children