the grudge

I have nightmares each week about that Friday in May One phone call from you and my entire world was changed Trust that you betrayed, confusion that still lingers You took everything I love and crushed it in between your fingers And I doubt you ever think about the damage that you did But I hold on to every detail like my life depends on it My undying love, now I hold it like a grudge And I hear your voice every time that I think I'm not enough And I try to be tough but I wanna scream How could anybody do the things you did so easily? And I say I don't care, I say that I'm fine But you know I can't let it go I've tried, I've tried, I've tried for so long It takes strength to forgive but I don't feel strong The arguments that I have won against you in my head In the shower, in the car and in the mirror before bed Yeah, I'm so tough when I'm alone and I make you feel so guilty And I fantasise about a time you're just a little sorry And I try to understand why you would do this all to me You must be insecure you must be so unhappy And I know in my heart hurt people hurt people And we both drew blood, but man those cuts were never equal And I try to be tough but I wanna scream How could anybody do the things you did so easily? And I say I don't care, I say that I'm fine But you know I can't let it go I've tried, I've tried, I've tried for so long It takes strength to forgive but I don't feel strong Ooh, do you think I deserved it all? Ooh, your flowers filled with vitriol You built me up to watch me fall You have everything and you still want more I tried to be tough, I try to be mean But even after all this, you're still everything to me And I know you don't care, I guess that that's fine But you know I can't let it go I've tried, I've tried, I've tried for so long It takes strength to forgive, but I'm not quite sure I'm there yet It takes strength to forgive, but