You Were Not There

I took a turn so harsh and mean, I was confused at how to be, It was a normal time for you, But such an awkward time for me, And now I'm sitting, blinking, feeling, watching, spinning out of my control. It came through rumbling down on me, Before I had a chance to think, There's nothing else for me to do, But to embrace it at the speed of - heart is pounding, mind is racing, eyes are rolling, everything went dark. Rolling, tumbling, rushing through to do enough, Fumbling, clumsily trying to keep up. It's getting close enough to see, And I can hear it taunting me, It's something bigger than I am, That's saying catch me if you can, And for some reason I just really, really, think I can. You were nowhere to be found, You were not there. You had just left, now you're gone, You must not care. I was not so upset that you were not there, It was about time to realize you did not care.