In the Van Somewhere Outside of Birmingham

We give daps and pounds And, yeah, I'll buy the next round But don't you dare try to hug me Why would another man want to touch me? Something's not right here Why would you compliment my hair Are you sick? Is this a dare What other explanation is there? We're men, that's how we're raised Don't smile, don't give too much praise Don't cry, don't beg, don't ask, just take Don't get tired, never take a break And above all else, show no affection It just goes without question Never let down your guard Just be a man, it's not hard Hello, dear reader Allow me to set the scene: In the back of the van somewhere outside of Birmingham It's another 90 degree day scorcher and the AC died days ago Our fearless protagonist sits between alfred., doodling yesterday's highlights on their tablet And Logan, who at present is succumbing to the warm air lulling him to sleep With every passing second his head droops lower and lower Until finally it finds itself resting comfortably on our heroes shoulder The following is an inner dialogue Well what do I do now We better turn the van around Take me home, this is not allowed Okay play it cool, play it cool, play it cool And remember everything you learned back in high school If a guy is too nice it means he wants to fuck you Raised southern baptist so that means no man above you Okay wait what that's ridiculous man A decade later and you're still letting these kids tell you how to be a man? Get it the fuck together, come up with a game plan We're still 2 more hours to Birmingham Just put your arm around him, just be fucking normal You spent the last 2 weeks together, why now to be formal? But what if someone sees? Then it's all over You'll avoid eye contact for the rest of the tour You'll never live this down, you'll never live this If you don't just put your arm around him, you'll regret it now And forever, why are you like this? You're not a leader, you're just a letdown A real man wouldn't panic, you'll never wear the crown Why can't you do it you coward? All your life you've wanted close male friends, why now to be a wallflower Where's that conviction you like to sing about? Where's that willpower? Are you just gonna sit here frozen in fear for 2 hours? Put your arm around him, just do it just do it It's now or never, just do it it Now or never You got this just unfreeze, get unstuck But then he woke up