Hugo the Human Cannonball

Well, they came to town With their elephants and clowns On a hit sticky August day And every telephone pole Had a poster that told Of the thrills that were coming our way There were trapeze fliers And men that ate fire And things we never dreamed existed And the radio and TV Told us we'd be Fools if we dared to miss it Now all three rings Held wondrous things Marvels of every invention But the big long shrouded Shape in the corner Increasingly drew our attention There were bareback riders Lions and tigers And clowns in their itty bitty car But every woman and man And child in the stand Had come to see the star Then a hush fell on the crowd As the men pulled the shroud From the muzzle that was 30 feet long And to screams and cheers He finally appeared And flamboyantly bowed to the throng He wore red sequined tights That sparkled in the lights And boots that came to his knees And a chromium Football helmet And a cape that flapped in the breeze And the dazzled crowd Shouted out loud You could hear them one and all We want Hugo! Hugo! Hugo! The Human Cannonball The aim was carefully calculated The trajectory was precise The charge was carefully measured And poured into the loading device The fuse was trimmed, the lights were dimmed Hugo slid down the barrel and then All was ready and Hugo's daddy Counted down from Ten! And the drums rolled Nine And our blood ran cold Eight! The ambulance stood by Seven! Several woman cried Six! The spotlight hit the net Five! No one would ever forget Four! Eternity passed Three! Every heart beat fast Two! And Hugo's daddy said, 'Are you ready Hugo?' One! And from the bowels of the gun, 'I'm a-ready, Papa!' Boom! Well, fire and smoke belched Out of the cannon And the earth trembled for a while And the big gun roared And Hugo soared Through the air like a projectile Two hundred and fifty Feet he flew Like an Air Force fighter jet But at the apex Of his trajectory He knew he's gonna miss the net Oh! Arms flailing He kept on sailing A terrified screaming creature And the crowd scattered As Hugo splattered All over the upper bleacher In the aftermath Of this tragic event Disbelief filled every face There was Hugo And there was Hugo There was Hugo all over the place! Well, the dust has Finally settled and The smoke has finally cleared Hugo's name And Hugo's fame Will always be revered But no one Ever too his place No matter who they were Because they never found Another man Of Hugo's ' caliber The Circus' main attraction The greatest star of all Was Hugo! Hugo! The Human Cannonball!