How May I Help You?

This is a story bout A little man named Rod Who did not have a mind of his own Just went along with his pathetic lonely life. Even when he went to school The teacher said "jump!" And he jumped and he jumped and he jumped Then he fell on the floor. Never let his feelings out Didn't have any friends Once he left school he hoped This would All change now. BUT It was not to be The world for him to see Mercy! Oh, mercy! Arrrggggghhhhhhaaaa! He had to get a job Wanted to go somewhere to relax for a while He went to work on a boat as a cabin boy... "Get on you knees and scrub the decks, I want to see you sweating. Make sure you're In my quarters around half past ten this evening..." He didn't like this one bit He got to get another job So he jumped off the boat And swam to shore To work on the beach in a bar. He met a chick working there Just like him Not too pretty Not too pretty She was sad & lonely just like him. They went to the cinema together and then Went back to his room, back to his room Made sweet loving to each others only friend, Only friend. The night after he walked out of his room, Heard a voice shout... "Boy! Go pick the dead rats outta the drain!" First day But it's OK From then, talks to Rodney like shit all day But Rod, doesn't do anything, just keeps it in. He thinks: 'fuck it! I just put up with this shit, I got a girl and a friend, I don't need nothing else' "How are you doing, my good man? (As Rodney gazes at Miranda) I see you got good taste, Miranda is nice girl, very nice girl..." "What's that supposed to mean? You trying say something, say it! Very friendly girl? Very friendly girl? What's that supposed to mean...?" Where does he go from here? What's going on? "Miranda your girl?" "Yeah, what of it?" "She very good expressing her affection for her friends, She my girl, your girl, everbody's girl..." "So you're saying that you and all the Other people that have come into this here Bar have been with her? But no one's come in for days, Apart from a couple of piss-heads..." "She had lovely tight cheeks!" "Not after I saw to her" Rod was furious Rod said to Miranda... "How could you do this to me?" "Well, once I was with you my whole life changed!" "So you got the confidence to disgrace yourself?" "No longer do I want to be a slave!" "What? What did you say?!" Asked Miranda would she say sorry... "You're weird, stay away from me!" Then he put some Laxatives into her tea... And he was on his own again...