Now Everybody's Me

Now Everybody's Me Rodney: Joe, shut up! Everybody hates Edie Brickell All my favourite shows are on TV All the restaurants serve my favourite food 'Cause now everybody's me Now my apartment's really crowded 'Cause I live there and I'm everybody And everybody's sleeping with my girl But, hey, everybody's me Now everybody's me (x4) Everybody's watching Married with Children Everybody's into bestiality The stores stopped selling Amstel light 'Cause now everybody's me Everybody loves Charles Manson Everybody wants to set him free And everybody's on the parole board 'Cause now everybody's me Now everybody's me (x4) I had to put an end to war Didn't make much sense to shoot at myself No more Christians, Jews, Muslims or Amway salesmen Just a whole planet of TV addicts Everybody's got hairy feet Everybody follows my philosophy Everybody's got a nephew named Jeff 'Cause now everybody's me They had to lower all the basketball nets 'Cause everybody's only 5 foot 3 And everybody likes to dress like a monkey 'Cause now everybody's me Now everybody's me (x4) Now everybody's into what I do Steve Albini, John? and Frank Sinatra sound exactly like me I even set up a duo with Julio Iglesias It was called Me and Julio Down By the Crackhouse 'Cause even Julio Iglesias is me I have the number one album I have all the albums 'Cause now everybody's me! + (1:59) (untitled) -------------------------- Now, I understand that some of you don't know Sarah Jane, so I'll tell You a little bit about her. She's a lesbian Eskimo midget albino. She Went to college and she started the Lesbian midget Eskimo Albino Student Union, and four hundred people signed up. There they were Hundreds of 'em, lesbian midget left-handed Eskimo albinos. Did I Mention the fact that she's left-handed? She's left-handed, alright Girl's got some strange hobbies. One of her hobbies is lowering children Into open manholes, which is kinda difficult 'cause a lot of the Children are taller than her, her being a midget and everything... or Her being a left-handed midget... or her being a left-handed lesbian Midget... or her being a left-handed lesbian albino midget... or her Being a lesbian left-handed albino midget Eskimo... life can be really Difficult on that young lady She bit me once, you know. Right here, ya see this? Left a mark. She was Lowerin' a friend of mine's kid into the sewer, I run up, and tried to Stop her. I said, "Listen there, you lesbian midget left-handed albino! And you stop right there!" Then she bit me. I'm afraid I'm gonna... I'm Gonna turn into a lesbian left-handed midget albino when the moon is Full Oh my God, the moon is full tonight! I can feel myself shrinking! I can Feel myself getting left-handed! I can feel myself getting the urge to Build an igloo! I can feel my skin turning white and my eyes getting Red! I can feel... I can feel the urge... to buy a Suzanne Vega album!! NOOO! NNNNNOOOO!!!! NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! Oh, I'm okay; it was just gas