White Curtains

Torn between Being a child my whole life or the man you need 'Cause there's the easy way out And there's blood, sweat and tears And I'll be gone more than I'm home for the next year And it'll take everything I have To not stop running You said it's never black and white with me Just lesser truths and shades of grey What the fuck did you see in me anyway? An investment never worth the price you paid For what it's worth I feel the strain But I'm too fucking scared of doing the right thing I'll never find it in myself to let someone love you properly If I saved up the hours that I've spent just drowning Starting out at the empty space from my side of the bed Well, I'd tread them all and the pictures drawn In the condensation on my window To see you standing there Lie to me, Tell me you still need me 'cause I owe that charade For the only reason I found sleep in the past three years And I owe that charade For the distance I keep between me and who I used to be Torn between Being a child my whole life or the man you need Torn between Being a child my whole life or the man you need If I saved up the hours that I've spent just drowning Starting out at the empty space from my side of the bed Well, I'd tread them all and the pictures drawn In the condensation on my window To see you standing there There's no shortage of new faces And so many places I've never been But the one place I keep in my head Is where the sun shines through your white curtains And the breeze that lifts them off the wall and gently wakes me to the world To an overwhelming familiar smell of home But I can't be there for long And I never wanted to be the one that only lets you down And a promise that I can keep is my two feet won't find the ground But your heart can't see the damage done when I'm around.