A Telegram For Me, Sir?

[Verse]

Rather give brain to twelve hundred undead shemales

Than answer these twelve hundred unread emails

Shit, how'd I let shit get this bad?

And why are all these friend requests from kids named Brad?

Why not a Madelyn or an Ashley or two?

Then maybe I'd respond in a timely fashion to you

This is not a friend request, just a friendly request

That we should bring back the motherfucking Pony Express

I suggest that if a horsе and his dude might die

For you to send your thing out and gеt a reply

Then maybe you might try to make email more meaningful

That's why you females haven't been recieving all my letters

They're blowing around in the wind

That poor boy and his horse encountered Indians

(And I feel bad for him, honestly)