Standoff

I can't justify the things that I have done
And all my past is what I am running from
I try to figure out the reason I am here
But no I don't know why I live my life in fear
I ignore
And I avoid my fate
But how long can I hold on to all this empty space
I know what I have to do to open my eyes
A live or die showdown between me and this life

And I don't know if I can accept what's really just been all my life
An epic standoff between what I think is real and all the lies

I live in denial
Can't accept my fate
And I try everything to cope with all this pain
And in reality the only thing I fear
Is not finding anything before I disappear

Everything is gonna be okay (Gotta tell myself)
Just gotta take it day to day (Gotta tell myself)
Everything is gonna be alright (Gotta tell myself)
I just can't run away (Gotta tell myself)
Everything that I am working up to (Gotta tell myself)
Everything that I am trying to do (Gotta tell myself)
Has got nothing to do with you
I'll be okay

I'll face every single fear I've ever had today

And I don't know if I can accept what's really just been all my life
An epic standoff between what I think is real and all the lies

Nothing I say or do is ever gonna make me see
That stuff ain't up to me
Nothing's changing me
Just let me be

Everything is gonna be okay (Gotta tell myself)
Just gotta take it day to day (Gotta tell myself)
Everything is gonna be alright (Gotta tell myself)
I just can't run away (Gotta tell myself)

An epic standoff between what I think is real and all the lies

Nothing I say or do is ever gonna make me see
That stuff ain't up to me
Nothing's changing me
Just let it be