what happy is

Sometimes I forget just where I would be

If I never answered your call

When you were looking for me

I'd probably be fucked up somewhere

In the back of the bar

Fighting off strangers and looking for keys to my car

I want to drive anywhere else

I want to be anywhere else but here

I'm looking comfort

I'm looking for change

I'm looking for anyone who could feel the same

I take things for granted

I take them too far

I guess I'll never know who you really are

And I'll never know what happy is

Sometimes I forget how hard it can

To have trust in anyone, hell to have trust in me

This is the loneliest place that I've ever been

But it's the only place that I'll ever learn to love again

This isn't healing

What is this feeling