Nonkilling 3 • The Anteroom • False Skull 1

I saw the face of God, a mouth in a pool of blood
At 9 in the morning, after sleep in a bathtub
A body can make you think that colors obtain in things
Like Maggie Nelson said, "The color inside of the—"
Can I feel nostalgia for a death I will never know?
The silence of silence; this is all that I've ever wanted
When I woke up in the tub invisible wrecked ships
Circled around my head, a voice screamed:

"You wouldn't want it
If you could see the pain in the anteroom
You wouldn't applaud it
Nothing on this side was built for you"

And now you're laughing
Would you laugh when they play it all back?
And in the movie of your life
You only speak in one scene
And when the door opens, you say
"I've been thinking 'bout it my whole life long"
And when they ask you what you mean
Your lips are moving, but the mic's not on

Thought it was a pool of blood
But then when the camera stopped
The whole thing evaporates
A voice with no body shouts:
"The money has all run out
What we used to call a job
Is now handled by machines, you can die in peace"

"You wouldn't want it –
If you could see the pain in the anteroom
You wouldn't applaud it
Nothing on this side was built for you"

And now you're laughing
Would you laugh when they play it all back?
And in the movie of your life
You only speak in one scene
And when the door opens, you say
"I've been thinking 'bout it my whole life long"
And when they ask you what you mean
Your lips are moving, but the mic's not on

What have you been trying to say?
Is this a joke or some kind of mistake?
No one's counting the days
Until your whole little body becomes even less than decay, decay