James In The Bathroom (2019 Tony Awards)

[JAMES CORDEN, sung]

I am hanging in the bathroom

Inside Radio City Musical Hall

I could stay right here because I fear

I shouldn't host the Tonys at all

You'd think being Tonys host

Would feel like sitting

On a Broadway throne

Now I'm against the wall

In this toilet stall

As I scroll through Twitter

On my phone

Reading people say

Corden's a talentless hag

And why CBS can't

Get Neil Patrick Harris back

Now I'm just James in the bathroom

James in the bathroom at the Tony's

Broadway's biggest fraud

I'm paranoid I'll fall

Or trip or rip my tux

Afraid that Anna Wintour think this outfit sucks

I'm just James who you don't know

James from the late late show

James in the bathroom by himself

[JOSH GROBAN, spoken]

You're not by yourself James

[JAMES CORDEN, spoken]

Josh Groban

How long have you been in the bathroom

[JOSH GROBAN, spoken]

Twelve months. Hosting the Tony's last year caused me such anxiety, I had to hide in the bathroom, and I still haven't left

[SARA BAREILLES, spoken]

Neither of us have

[JAMES CORDEN, spoken]

Sara Bareilles? I thought this was the mens' bathroom

[SARA BAREILLES, spoken]

It's 2019, James, get over it

[JOSH GROBAN, spoken]

Look we know that hosting the Tony's can leave you feeling empty

[SARAH BAREILLES & JOSH GROBAN, sung]

They think being Tony's host would give you

All the Broadway glory you seek

Till you remember you're the warm-up guy

For shows that sell out eight times a week

And inside your head, the voice of your mother cries

"You should've gone to law school!"

And your night's destroyed cause you're paranoid

That everyone would rather be watching Big Little Lies!

[ALL singing, JAMES CORDEN, JOSH GROBAN, SARAH BAREILLES]

But it's just hosts in the bathroom

Hosts in the bathroom at the Tony's

God, we truly suck

Will CBS get rid of hosts?

Like the Oscars did?

Will CBS swap us out

For that Young Sheldon kid?

Oh, we're just hosts that feel some loathing

Bloated in our clothing

Scared we'll make a stage gaffe

In front of Laurie Metcalf

God, she's such a treasure

That's why we won't leisure

Hanging in the bathroom by ourselves

[JAMES CORDEN]

Neil? Are you also hiding in the bathroom because you also having crippling insecurities?

[NEIL PATRICK HARRIS, spoken]

Insecurities?

No, I just had to use the bathroom