Heaven or Hell

[Chorus 1 (Extended)]

Gotta watch my back

It ain't safe at night

There's too much to do

Gotta get my paper right

And there's a lot of my dogs

They either dead or in jail

But if I kill myself

Would it be heaven or hell?

Gotta watch my back

It ain't safe at night

There's too much to do

Gotta get my paper right

And there's a lot of my dogs

They either dead or in jail

But if I kill myself

Would it be heaven or hell?

[Verse 1]

Yo, at this present time there's a lot of nonsense at stake

Too many ideas and decisions left to contemplate

Too much to deal wit, too much to make a nigga have to steal shit

And it's hurtin' 'cause I gotta feel it with too much anger

Too many niggas know me, but they don't know me

Analayzed popular stranger, and peep how niggas try to change ya

But I can't cope with no antidote, two options, one is slittin' my wrists

Go to the precinct with a clip my fist

So I keep a cig in my lips, shit is painful, fuck suicide

Done did too much dirt to know if I'ma be angel

So help me god, cry in my sleep

'Cause you ain't pull me out of shark infested waters to die on the beach

And I was told "don't trust, 'cause they plot at the end'

So I treat friends as nobodies, and nobody as friend

Yo, it just seems like trouble's followin' me, lock and key

Stuck in the belly of the beast, and it's swallowin' me

With no cream, with no bundle to hustle and no scheme

No niggas to run with and no team

Tell me what its like to have ran out of options when you goin' all out

Or what it's like to be in love and fall out

Just want to put it behind me and breathe without the fuckin' 9 to squeeze

Without the weed and Hennessy to keep my mind at ease

Without rollin' over, coilin' myself, tryin' to sleep

Without bein' homeless and starvin and dyin' to eat

Shit wasn't like this in the youth house

Throughout my teen years been forced to grow up too fast, ma'fucker I'm not a youth now

Wish I could let a lot of people see the true Mouse

But I'm too scared to see him myself, what'd be the use now?

[Chorus 2]

I done changed too much

I guess the water ran dry

Man I been put through shit

For most of my life

And I done lost my breath

But still I'm tryna fight

I can't take no more

'Cause I'm dyin' inside

[Verse 2]

From houses to gas stations, I've done robbed 'em all

Facing ten-to-twenty, that'll start a robber's fall

Jacked whips in parking lots, I got the drop from Fords

And this amount of victims coming out a shopping mall

I'm a totally different nigga when I'm copping the raw

Apartments with A.D.T., got through the locks in the door

I met some dollared out chicks, somehow I got in the drawers

Seen niggas die in cold blood, they had got shot in the war

Want a seed for the wrong reasons, to see me different

In hopes of me guiding so he'll never have to see a prison

But my shorty got it fucked up

Or maybe I just got it fucked up, somebody got it fucked up

What a nigga got besides his music?

Thirsty as hell, can't smoke the water, 'cause I know that I'll abuse it

And ma'fuckers can't afford to see that fuse lit

They can't afford to see a nigga on some new shit

And where my pops at? Nigga need him now

Show up later on when I'm black, and fuck, I'm bleedin' now

Showin' my moms another side she never seen in me

How the fuck she don't understand when it's her genes in me?

How'd I progress in therapy while wantin' to leave this world?

And I know how to beat the system, can't beat the world

I talk that "take my own life to get off the scene quick"

Unfortunate that I'm too much of a genius to really mean shit

[Chorus 1]

Gotta watch my back

It ain't safe at night

There's too much to do

Gotta get my paper right

And there's a lot of my dogs

They either dead or in jail

But if I kill myself

Would it be heaven or hell?

[Chorus 2]

I done changed too much

I guess the water ran dry

Man I been put through shit

For most of my life

And I done lost my breath

But still I'm tryna fight

I can't take no more

'Cause I'm dyin' inside