Unwanted Lifestyle

I'm alive but I'm actually dyin'
Loud but I'm actually quiet
Hurt but I'm tryna stay solid
Prayin' as I speed in this car
Shinin' but it's actually dark
My headlights off as I'm drivin'
Some people'll kill for this lifestyle
That I don't wanna live no more
I didn't even cry when Lil' E died
I'm thinkin' that my tears are gone
Heaven sent, I speed through the forest and I don't hit a tree
Flyer than a hornet but I'm real as I can be, yeah
You can stay here or leave, yeah
I ain't talkin' Tylenol
More water than Niagara Falls
Sold codeine outta mama house
When they turn the lights off, all of a sudden I'm hidden now
Got rich and now I'm at my dangerousest
Window, I be hangin' out, I love how that chopper sound
Sometimes I forget I'm famous
All of a sudden she hit me back then she was dodgin' me
The drive-by would be quicker but we plan on parkin' these, ayy
Saint Laurent, I'm drippin', bitch, don't even talk to me
Shouldn't have to pay for your love but I was told nothin' was free
How you wanna be me and I don't wanna be me?
Remember we was hustlin' backwards
Now I need six figures for my album
And I count that money with a passion
Try to hide that struggle with the fashion
And my jewelry rose gold like Jalen
Think I'm at peace long as I'm dyin' faded
My straitjacket Moncler, I'm goin' crazy
I'm alive but I'm actually dyin'
Loud but I'm actually quiet
Hurt but I'm tryna stay solid
Prayin' as I speed in this car
Shinin' but it's actually dark
My headlights off as I'm drivin'
Some people'll kill for this lifestyle
That I don't wanna live no more
I didn't even cry when Lil' E died
I'm thinkin' that my tears are gone
When they turn the lights off, all of a sudden I'm hidin' now
Got rich and now I'm at my dangerousest
Window, I be hangin' out, I love how that chopper sound
Sometimes I forget I'm famous