[Calvin Candie]
This is Ben. He's an old joe that lived around here for a long time, and I do mean a long damn time. Old Ben here took care of my daddy and my daddy's daddy. Till he up and keeled over one day, old Ben took care of me. Growin' up the son of a huge plantation owner in Mississippi puts a white man in contact with a whole lotta black faces. I spent my whole life here, right here in Candieland, surrounded by black faces. Now seein' 'em every day, day in and day out, I only had one question: why don't they kill us? Now right out there on that porch, three times a week for fifty years, old Ben here would shave my daddy with a straight razor. Now, if I was old Ben, I woulda cut my daddy's goddamn throat, an' it wouldn't-a taken me no fifty years of doin' neither. But he never did. Why not? See, the science of phrenology is crucial to understandin' the separation of our two species. And the skull of the African here? The area associated with submissiveness is larger than any human or any other sub-human species on planet Earth. If you examine this piece of skull here you'll notice three distinct dimples. Here, here and here. Now, if I was holdin' the skull of an Issac Newton or a Gallileo, these three dimples would be found in the area of the skull most associated with creativity. But this is the skull of old Ben. And in the skull of old Ben, unburdened by genius, these three dimples exist in the area of the skull most associated with servility. Now bright boy, I will admit you are pretty clever. But if I took this hammer here, and I bashed in your skull with it, you would have the same three dimples...in the same place...as old Ben...
[Calvin Candie]
Now lay your palms flat on the table top! If you lift those palms off that turtle shell table top, Mr. Butch is gonna let loose with both barrels of that sawed off! There have been a latta lies said around this diner table here tonight, but that you can believe. Mr. Moguy, would you be so kind as to collect the pistol hangin' on those boys hips here? Thank you ever so much.
[Leonide Moguy]
Doctor
[Calvin]
Where were we?
[Leonide Moguy]
Jackass.
[Calvin]
Oh yes... I do believe you were just getting ready to make me a proposition to buy Broomhilda. I am right? Bring out Hildi!
[Stephen]
Your way, honey.
[Calvin]
Sit your ass in that goddamn chair!
[Stephen]
Lay your hands flat on that table.
[Calvin]
And shut your mouth! Dr. Schultz... in Greenville, you yourself said, that for the "Right Nigger" you'd be willing to pay what some may consider is a ridiculous amount. To which, me myself said, "What is your definition of ridiculous? ", to which you said, "Twelve thousand dollars". Now considering you all have ridden a whole lotta miles, went to a whole lotta trouble, and done spread a whole lotta bull, to
purchase this lovely lady right here, it would appear that Broomhilda is in fact the "Right Nigger"! And if y'all wanna leave
Candyland with Broomhilda... the price is twelve thousand dollars.
[Dr. King Schultz]
And I take it you prefer the "take
it or leave it" style of negotiating?
[Calvin]
Yes I do, doctor.You see, under the laws of Chickasaw County, Broomhilda here is my property And I can chose to do with my property whatever I so desire! And if you all think my price for this nigger here is too steep, what I'm gonna desire to do is...take this fuckin' hammer here, and beat her ass to death with it! Right in front of both y'all! Ain't it good, fella? Then we can examine the three dimples inside Broomhilda skull! Now! What's it gonna be, Doc? Huh? What's it gonna be?
[Schultz]
May I lift the hands off the table
top in order to remove my billfold?
[Calvin]
Yes you may.
[Stephen]
That twelve.
[Calvin]
Sold! To the man with the exceptional beard, and his unexceptional nigger.
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