People Are Pets

They snuck a camera in the courtroom

All of a sudden you’re a star

This ain’t the kind of attention

You thought would tear your life apart

Not you got an e-book deal coming

Maybe a podcast tour after that

A memoir sponsored by your miranda rights

On body-cam being misread

Maybe you could call it:

People are pests

(I guess you already knew that)

People are pets

(Lay down play dead)

They snuck a camera in the courtroom

All of a sudden he looks kinda scared

He ain’t dressing like he used to

They shaved his beard

They cut his hair

I’m not sure if that’s his first wife or kid

Sitting in the second row

But they look disillusioned by

All the things he seems to know

Set my bail

Send me to hell

Burst into flames

Then stomp me out

People are pests

(I guess you already knew that)

People are pets

(Lay down play dead)

Or give it a rest

Hell hath no fury like a step-son scorned

Doomed to the suburbs all lonely and bored

And those hormones oh lord

Knows how he’s suffered

You’ve done all you can just keep the house alarm on all night

Don’t worry baby I’ll be out in no time

I might be better off with those inner inmate education plans

I might even finish up this GED after all these years

And I maybe I could write a book and we could call it

Maybe I could write a memoir and we’d call it

People are pests

(I guess you already knew that)

People are pets

(Lay down play dead)

Or at least give it a rest