50 Year Old Man

Computer doesn't work for me

I had a Sinclair back in 1983

OL2QU, pre-warranty

And don't forget he's still up to it

That Steve Albini

He's in collusion with Virgin trains

Against me

I'm a fifty year old man

I'm a fifty year old man

But it won't get me

Go down Manchester town

Can't navigate it

The club scene, man

You can't compare with it

One third of securities count

I can't understand that

Again

You're not real boy

I say you're not real boy

You're a gym (teacher)

You're a Cancer and I expect

A little shit

I'm a fifty year old man

And I like it

I got a three foot rock hard on

But I'm too busy to use it

I'm a fifty year old man

I'm a fifty year old man

What you gonna do about it?

I go round a hotel

I see "Throw the towel on the floor"

On The Green Man

I throw it on the floor and

I piss in it

I'm a fifty year old man

And I like it

I'm trying to...

And don't forget

You try to destroy me

You're in collusion with the trains

Don't try and kid me

I'm a fifty year old man

Go down to the town

Can't navigate it

The club scene, man

You can't get in there

(Banjo interlude)

(Backing vocals repeat: 50 year old man)

I'm a fifty year old man

And I like it

I'm a fifty year old man

What're you gonna do about it?

And don't forget, you tried to destroy me

Steve Albini

You're in collusion with the trains

Don't try and kid me

I'm a fifty year old man

And I like it

I'm a fifty year old man

What're you gonna do about it?

I've got a three foot rock hard on

But I'm too busy to use it

I'm a fifty year old man

And I like it

I'm a fifty year old man

What're you gonna do about it?

Go down Manchester town

Can't navigate it

The club scene, man

You can't compare with it

I'm a fifty year old man

And I like it

I'm a fifty year old man

What're you gonna do about it?

And don't forget he's still up to it

(Interlude)

An inferior product mess

An inferior product man

Just over two thirds the price

I'm proud of it

I'm proud of it

I'm a type of guy who knows what is on CD

And then they lecture me on turning rubbish out

While shouting themselves out of existence

If they care so much, why don't they try eating

Some of those cardboard cut-outs themselves

And they stuff the complimentary catering down their neck

Do the fifth re-take of their attempt to be scruffy

On a train

And go back to counselling and communicating

I'm an inferior product man

I'm an inferior product mix

They call me "Bad Head"

Don't ever forget it

And here is the fade out

Fade out

Fade out