The Battle of Hampton Roads

Tonight, two great ships will pull back to their ports

Depleted of everything that shoots flames and reports

And in the morning the shells will wash up on the shore

And the mighty of Earth will have no other recourse

But to shiver and shake and make shit in their shorts

Because we have been told that if you've been assured

There's a way to live the values your forefathers gave you

Prepare to be told, "That shit's gay dude"

But I guess that what they say is true

And there is no race more human, no one throws it away like they do

The things I used to love I have come to reject

The things I used to hate I have learned to accept

And the worst of the three you now have to expect

Satan ain't hard to see you without craning your neck

He'll be seventy-some inches tall

He'll be chugging a beer and he'll be grabbing his balls

He's a remote explosive waiting for someone to call

He's just eighteen for now but hes going to murder us all

Solidarity's gonna give a lot less than it'll take

Is there a girl at this college who hasn't been raped?

Is there a boy in this town that's not exploding with hate?

Is there a human alive ain't looked themselves in the face

Without winking or saying what they mean without drinking

Who will believe in something without thinking

"What if somebody doesn't approve?"

Is there a soul on this earth that isn't too frightened to move?

I think the wrong people got a hold of your brain

When it was nothing but a piece of putty

Though try as you may but you will always be a tourist

Little buddy

And half the time, I open my mouth to speak

It's to repeat something that I've heard on TV

And I've destroyed everything that wouldn't make me more like Bruce Springsteen

So I'm going back to New Jersey, I do believe they've had enough of me

So when I leave Boston, my tail is between my legs

After deep cuts of patience and drunk to the dregs

And now I'm heading west on 84 again

And I'm as much of an asshole as I've ever been

And there is still nothing about myself I respect

Still haven't done anything I did not later regret

I have a hand and a napkin when I'm looking for sex

And that's no one to talk to when feeling depressed

And so now when I drink, I'm going to drink to excess

And when I smoke, I will smoke gaping holes in my chest

And when I scream, I will scream until I'm gasping for breath

And when I get sick, I will stay sick for the rest

Of my days peddling hate at the back of a Chevy Express

Each one a fart in the face of your idea of success

And if this be thy will, then fuckin' pass me the cup

And I'm sorry dad, no, I'm not making this up!

But, my enemy, it's your name on my lips as I go to sleep

And I know what little I've known of peace

Yes, I've done to you what you've done to me

And I'd be nothing without you, my darling, please don't ever leave

Please don't ever leave