Yes, Dear Reader. We enjoy those ‘in depth’ interviews as much as anyone else. But - BUT - we also enjoy the lighter side of music, too. We simply cannot go on any longer without knowing that Orla Gartland has a crush on Harry Potter. Each to their own, Orla.

What’s your favourite thing about being a musician?
Putting feelings into songs and putting the songs out into the world.

What was the first record you bought?
Busted - ‘A Present For Everyone’. I was obsessed with Charlie Simpson and scribbled out the other guys’ faces.

Are any of your lyrics secretly rude?
A couple. In my song ‘Do You Mind?’ I sing about seeing an ex after time has passed, and the lyric is “when I close my eyes I think of you beside her” - but originally, it was “when I close my eyes I think of you inside her”. Still works.

If you had a pet whale, what would you call it?
Alro.

What’s the furthest you’ve travelled to attend someone else’s gig?
I flew to New York to watch my best friend Lauren Aquilina play a show with Sasha Sloan. It was so worth it.

If you could bring something extinct back to life, what would you choose?
Dinosaurs.

What did you last dream about?
I dreamt about drowning and woke up in a coughing fit. It was bad.

What is your favourite time of day?
I’m a sucker for 5-7pm - I do my best work around then!

If you won the lottery, what would you spend the cash on?
A big old massive house for me and another for my parents. I would decorate it just perfectly - I am drooling at the thought.

If you were on Mastermind, what would your specialist subject be?
Merch. I’m talking t-shirt blanks and their thread count, the real nitty-gritty. Being an independent artist leaves you with pockets of truly boring knowledge.

What’s your biggest fear?
Not trying.

Who’s your favourite new band?
Right now, I am loving MUNA. I’ve loved them for years but seeing them join forces with Phoebe Bridgers for ‘Silk Chiffon’ has awakened my obsession once again.

What is your earliest memory?
I remember being in my garden a lot. It’s not quite the earliest memory, but I remember we had a big tree, and I was obsessed with Avril Lavigne, so at age 7, I made my dad come out and take pictures of me in the big tree with my school tie on over a t-shirt.

What is your most treasured possession?
My pink telecaster.

Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character?
Harry Potter. Fight me.

What did you want to be when you were growing up?
A postman.

What is the best present you’ve ever been given?
A small nylon string guitar. It’s the least intimidating instrument ever, so nice to just pick up and noodle on.

What’s the scariest thing you’ve ever done?
Moving to London to try to be a pop star.

Who’s your favourite member of One Direction?
As an Irish person, I legally have to say Niall.

Do you believe in aliens?
Can’t say I do.

If you had to be on a TV gameshow, which would you choose?
Deal or No Deal.

What’s the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you?
At a big Dublin show, I once fell backwards over an amp, with my two legs up in the air facing the crowd. I was wearing a skirt.

What’s one thing you’ve always wanted to try?
Skydiving!

If you could have a superpower of your choosing, what would it be?
Instant travel. Not like time travel - just to click my fingers and be somewhere else right away.

What’s your favourite sandwich filling?
Cheese.

How punk are you out of ten?
6.

What’s the silliest thing you own?
A Soda Stream.

Tell us a secret about yourself?
I hate ukuleles.

Taken from the November 2021 edition of Dork, out now. Orla Gartland’s debut album ‘Woman On The Internet’ is out now.