Drunk By Noon

There once was a poodle who thought he was a cowboy He lived in a cage the size of his thumb And, though his white horse was a box of toothpicks He galloped around 'till he was hit by a car Sometimes I flap my arms like a hummingbird Just to remind myself I'll never fly And sometimes I burn my arms with a cigarette Just to pretend I won't scream when I die If my life was as long as the moon I'd still be jealous of the sun If my life lasted only one day I'd still be drunk by noon Yes, I'd still be drunk by noon Sometimes I hope to come down with cancer At least then I'll get to stay in bed and watch TV all day And on my deathbed I'll get all the answers Even if all my questions are taken away If my life was as long as the moon I'd still be jealous of the sun And if my life lasted only one day I'd still be drunk by noon I'd still be drunk by noon