The Waitress

[Verse 1: Slug] A city full of people and my favorite is that waitress And she treats me like some type of common vagrant I see her every day, but there's nothing to say Unless I decide to step inside of that cafe I only get to sit if I buy something to eat Otherwise it's best to keep my feet moving down that street And god damn she's a hard bitch Talks at me like I'm the bad dog that got into the garbage Yeah I know that the toilet is for customers You ain't got to tangle up the strings to make this puppet work It doesn't have to be a game of patty cake But it ain't like you don't know I sleep in that alleyway And by the way, I can see it in your eyes You're angry with your life, not a stranger to the fight I bet you hate every man that you date And you're probably addicted to all types of escape You take it out on me that you're all alone When you know you got your own closet full of hollow bones Watch the tone when you speak to old folks I'm grown, just trying to get out of this Minnesota cold [Spoken] Look lady, I'm homeless, I'm crazy I'm so hopeless I'm suicidal daily If you and I can't co-exist, let's fake it 'Cause I ain't got the energy it takes for this relationship [Verse 2: Slug] I'm waiting for a city bus to flatten me And transport me to the ever after happily Maybe reincarnated with luck Come back to Earth as a cockroach in your tip cup She said she's had it up to here She's gonna call authorities if I don't disappear I love her threats, it rejuvenates my breath I give her stress for the reaction that it gets I got a pocket full of panhandled money On a cup of bad coffee and a stale honey bun In front of everyone she calls me bum But she notices my absence on them afternoons I don't come So here I am, thorn in her hip Holding down the corner table all morning with some corn chips Ignoring the insults and evil eyes I feed off of 'em, I wonder when she'll realize That she's the only reason I visit The only woman in my world that acknowledges my existence And if my ship ever comes, I'll miss it Because I'm getting old and I ain't got much left to give it So there it is and I have to live with it I had the chance to make a difference, but I didn't In the cafe bathroom drinking free tap water Thinking: "Damn, I should've been a better father to my daughter"