Disassociate

[Verse 1] You said that you would be here by my side and I believed it Told you if you leave that I'll be fine, like I don't need it Built a life without you then you left it all in pieces Now it's getting hard to do the normal things like sleep and eat And even though I got a heart It's barely beating in my chest Never trade it for a moment back before we even met And tell myself with what I'm knowin' now I should've never let you be a crutch for all the trauma manufactured in my head And I'm back home now but I been gone for three weeks I don't even talk to the ones I like Got a voice in my head just a bit too high Tellin' me you'll never get shit right It's like if the pressure gettin' too much to take I disassociate Lookin' at the actions I make is just a roller blade Tryna be a person you want but I can't hold away Karma smiled right at my face and let you hold the blade [Chorus] And you pulled me under I can feel you in me Do you ever wonder if I drowned? Lookin' in the storm but there's not enough to find Yeah I broke a heart, does it hurt when you die? Hard to move ahead when you're stuck in your eyes Keep on looking beyond, beyond, beyond But everybody's gone and there's nothin' left to say You could be the last in my line of mistakes Tell me if we did what we said we would change What would life be like, be like, be like, be like, be like? What would life be like? What would life be like? What would like be like? [Verse 2] You said that you would be here by my side and I believed it Told you if you leave then I'll be fine, like I don't need ya Try to prove it right but you just left me all in pieces Now it's gettin' hard to do the normal shit like even breathin' Even though I got a heart It's barely beatin' in my chest I don't think you even gave a chance to see my best When you don't know yourself You find it's normal feelin' less And that's a narrative you built to find the comfort in the stress What I hope to be Therapist and friends tryna open me Look at me unhappy, like it's something that I chose to be Counted on a fairytale story they all sold to me Took me finally being alone to say– That I can't count on anyone that I love and you act proud That's the way that you know, in the background And I trust you again, I'mma back down Left a hole in my chest, yeah [Chorus] And you pulled me under I can feel you in me Do you ever wonder if I drowned? Lookin' in the storm but there's not enough to find Yeah I broke a heart, does it hurt when you die? Hard to move ahead when you're stuck in your eyes Keep on looking beyond, beyond, beyond But everybody's gone and there's nothin' left to say You could be the last in my line of mistakes Tell me if we did what we said we would change What would life be like, be like, be like, be like, be like? [Outro] What would life be like? What would life be like? What would life be like?