How Selfish I Seem

Every cell is always pushing me but my decision comes so slow To satisfy another vibe and not just my ego Cos all this overthinking’s got me thinking on how we go from us to strangers Can I overcome myself and make putting you first second nature Born to be dead to me The waters run deep underneath me, I’m waiting for him patiently Confront my feelings every day, do I deserve you or am I just meant to drift away Time and time again I cut you out before we settle in Too much of a coward to keep you close as a friend Into my skin bores a failure that lingers Wipe clean the blood as I pick at the splinter How selfish I seem The waters run deep underneath me, I’m waiting for her patiently Confront my feelings every day, do I deserve you or am I just meant to drift away Another shallow grave, another chance to fuck this up, an emotional dead end to add to the cycle It never ends, and win or lose it’s just another time, another way and I can’t take this anymore