Customs

[Skit: Wiley, Customs Agent, and Customs Agent's Superior] Hello sir, can I check your bag please? Yeah yeah yeah, go on, go on, go on, go on Can I ask where you're going? I'm going to Barbados just to see the island for a couple days Ohhh, you like to travel? Yeah, you know I like a bit of sightseein' and stuff Just wanna go and see Barbados really Alright, hold on a minute Yo, you check the boy there? I'm doing it now Wellan Ey boy, you got drugs haulin' off What d'you mean officer? I don't carry nothin' nowhere Hold on Wellan, let me check the (?) Ey boy, stand up there (?) Can I see your passport please, sir? Yeah, let me just get it out the bag wait a sec, sec Here, here Yo this boy (?) Ey boy, we gotta take a urine test now Um, 'ello mate, what it is is We do these checks because uh, there's a lot uh, you know There's a lot of drugs going back and forth and that So uh, step this way And we're gonna uh, take a sample of your urine Alright alright mate, so you're a police officer from England then And you just work up there? Yeah yeah yeah, what it is is we help out with immigration As you know, there's a lot of people doing this sort of thing So we have to make sure that it's all sorted Yeah I know what you mean You know, like make sure no one ain't slippin' through With anything that they shouldn't be, you know how it is Anyway son, I'm sure you, I'm sure you Yeah yeah yeah, I know I know I know I know Sure you know Okay then, so would you like to take um A sample of your urine into this tube And then uh, when you finish, the sink's there Wash your hands, and um, yeah Give us back the tube Okay okay okay, cool Here you go, officer, there's the tube Okay son would you like to take a seat in there? Yeah And um, give us like a minute or two (Okay, okay) And I'll get back with the results And then um, hopefully we can get you on this flight And you'll go to Barbados and uh, everything will be sorted You know(Yeah, exactly)A little bit of sightseein' Wouldn't ya? Defo man, that was the main aim, you know what I mean? I come to Jamaica but I just wanted to pop over to Barbados But yeah, alright, sort that out for me cool Okay mate, um, what's happened is You are 69.7 percent THC level So um, yeah, you you Do you smoke weed, at all? Yeah I smoke weed officer, to be honest with you I do smoke weed, I'm not gonna lie, you know what I mean? I'll have a puff here and there Okay cause what it is, is, um, usually what they wanna do Is run you up the hospital, you know uh, go to the Kingston, the uh, the hospital and uh What they'll do is an x-ray, because uh, they Think that you've swallowed some class A Nah man, I ain't done that Officer I told ya, I smoke weed bro, and that is what I do I'm not, uh Right now, I just wanna go over to Barbados and do a bit Of sightseein' you get me? See if I might see Rihanna, if it's possible Hahahahaha, I hear ya son but let me have a talk With my pal in there, because as I said anyway We'll have a talk, and if he gives it the go ahead We'll let you go this time, but just to let you know If you do smoke weed, when you know you're gonna fly Don't really smoke, because then, obviously If they see ya, or if they look in your eyes and it looks A bit red, they're obviously gonna do one of these checks And one of these checks could obviously mean you go up The hospital, and they do the x-ray, and obviously That'll waste your time a bit, but, hold on a sec man Let me sort this Okay okay, cool cool cool Okay Richard, you're free to go As I said next time, don't, um Get, erm, stay away from the weed When you're about to fly cause obviously You don't want to get caught up in one of these checks Okay son? See you later, have a nice flight Have a nice time in Barbados, and if you see Rihanna Tell her I said hi (Hahahaha) Wouldn't ya? I will mate, I will, thanks, see ya later Fucking prick