The First Big Weekend (karaoke version)

So that was the first big weekend of the summer

Starts Thursday as usual with the canteen quiz
And again no-one wins the big cash prize
Later I do my sound bloke routine
By approaching Gina's new boyfriend to say that
He shouldn't feel that there's any animosity between us
And then I even go and make peace with her
Shouldn't have bothered

Then on Friday night we went through to the Arches

There was only one car going
So some of us had to get the train
We got through quite late
Then we went to a pub to take the gear
There was no problems getting in
We saw some others waiting down the front of the queue
So we skipped in
It was a good night, everyone was nutted
And I ended up dancing with some blonde girl
I thought she had been quite pretty
Until last night when Matthew informed me that she had, in fact, been a pig

When the club finished we wandered the streets for a while
Until we got to this 24-hour café
I didn't like the look of it so we left and got a taxi back to Morag's flat
I couldn't sleep so I sat about drinking
Someone else's strawberry tonic wine and tried to keep everyone else up

Then at ten o'clock in the morning we went downstairs to buy some drink
We had intended to watch the football in the afternoon
But we'd passed out by then and slept right through it
Awaking to find that England had won two-nil

Then we went to get the train home and had a few in the station bar
We had some stuff left from the previous night's supplies
So when we got home we decided to go down to John's indie disco

Same story as Friday
Lots of hugging, lots of dancing etc. etc
I couldn't sleep again so went to the park to look at the toon
Taking a detour through the playpark
To get in we had to climb over a ten foot steel fence
Which resulted in severe bruising of our hands, legs and groins
But we had a good laugh on the stuff, especially the tube-slide
Which probably doubles up as a urinal for drunk teens

Then we walked through the woods to have a look at the tomb
Was a big disappointment, but the mist on the lake was cool

Sunday afternoon we go up to John's with a lot of beer in time to watch The Simpsons
It was a really good episode about love
Always ending in tragedy except, of course, for Marge and Homer
It was quite moving at the end
And to tell you the truth my eyes were a bit damp

Then we watched these young girls in swimsuits have a water fight in the street
(You taping this, aye?)
We went up the pub about ten
It was busy for a Sunday night
Lots of people we know, including my first ever girlfriend
Who I still find very attractive, quite frankly, but I didn't really speak to her
She's probably still a bitch, anyway
Her friend Gillian was there
I had a chat with her, she was still quite pleasant

At the same time I watched Malcolm make some
Terrible attempt to try and chat up a girl we know called Jo
He made some remark about her skirt that was barely there the previous night or something

I couldn't sleep again that night
Thanks to some seriously disturbing nightmares
Matthew says I should cut down on the cheese

Went out for the weekend, it lasted for ever
High with our friends it's officially summer
Went out for the weekend, it lasted for ever
High with our friends it's officially summer
Went out for the weekend, it lasted for ever
High with our friends it's officially summer
Went out for the weekend, it lasted for ever
High with our friends it's officially summer

I got some sleep eventually on Monday afternoon
It was a beautiful day
And later that evening Malcolm introduced me to the power of Merrydown
£1.79 a litre, 8.2% - mmmm
Judith and Laura came round later
And we sat in my back garden and drank
Then Matthew came round and we went up the town

It's officially summer