How To Disappear

It's a slow ride, slipping out of focus
A steady decline, every day's the same

It aches until you tell yourself
You can't feel it anymore
But it makes your shadow heavy
As you drag it on the floor
And you're happy til you're not
Then you're unsure if you ever were

"You're looking tired lately
Is it getting hard to hold yourself together?"

The vespertine reluctance to stay awake
And engage with anything that you say
Are you keeping count of how often I dissociate
When asked "is everything okay?"

When all I wanna know is how to disappear
Without leaving you to worry about me
It hurts to say, but I'm getting tired
Of running away from the same pain

Sorry if I've been avoiding the question
Sorry if I've been avoiding the question

What if you woke up to an empty bed
And a note that said
"Is it disregard or discontent that lures the sparrow to its end?"
Sharp despair laid bare in the sunlight golden
Fractured glass on an afternoon of grief unspoken

Lately I haven't been myself at all
Sorry if I've been avoiding the question
I haven't been myself at all
Sorry if I've been avoiding the question
I haven't been myself at all

When all I wanna know is how to disappear
Without leaving you to worry about me
It hurts to say, but I'm getting tired
Of running away from the same pain

"Is everything okay?"
(Is everything okay, everything okay?)
"Is everything okay?"
(Is everything okay, everything okay?)
"Is everything okay?"
(Is everything okay, everything okay?)
"Is everything okay?"
(Is everything okay, everything okay?)

Sorry if I've been avoiding the question
Sorry if I've been avoiding the question

When all I wanna know is how to disappear
It's all I wanna know
When all I wanna know is how to disappear
It's all I wanna know