Afterthought

I woke up this morning still wearing that tie
The one with the hammer and sickle design
Threw up all the pills my doctor prescribed
And I went out to fetch me some air
This world was so crowded with billboards and signs
Two trucks double parked in parallel lines
I thought about breakfast but settled on wine
Always choose hunger over despair
And what's possible over what's there
Because it isn't as though we get what we want
No matter how hard or long we have fought
And my happiness is a mere afterthought
When I'm with her I keep it in mind
Then she leaves and I've run out of time
I sat down today in a high barber's chair
To hear the town gossip and clean up my hair
He said she was seen on the bus station stairs
With her suitcase threatening to walk
Not sure how true it was but I'll hazard a guess
Probably not more and it's probably not less
If that college kid bookie was accepting bets
The brackets would mostly be chalk
It's safe to assume that she's lost
But it isn't as though we get what we want
No matter how hard or long we have fought
And my happiness is a mere afterthought
When I'm with her I keep it in mind
Then she's gone and I've run out of time
I can't be concerned with the state that I'm in
At the height of the scandal with vertigo spins
I'll take every audition til I'm Errol Flynn
And bring it to life off the page
And I'll get up tomorrow still wearing that tie
The one with the skull and the crossbone designs
If I'm asked if I miss her it's easy to lie
In this world that's called more of the same
No I wouldn't feel proud or ashamed
'Cause it isn't as though we get what we want
No matter how hard or long we have fought
And my happiness is a mere afterthought
When I'm with her I keep it in mind
Then she leaves and I've run out of time