[Skit]
Guys, we're gonna get in trouble
No, we're not, my dad won't even care
He doesn't even go in here
Who's got the flashlight? Bring it here
This is where he keeps all his old stuff
Awesome
Look at all this stuff, I'm scared
Okay, I'm leaving
Don't leave, this–,this is cool
I found a chainsaw
Try and start it
Can't even start it
What was that? Uhh, I just stepped on a hockey mask
Arghh, get out, rargh
Aghhh!
[Verse 1]
If I were to rap about the crap that's out
That's the route you probably want me to take
‘Cause you're just dyin' to know what I think
And my take on some other rappers
If I was to say somethin' about Paul Wall
You'd probably crap in your pants, ‘cause I'm white and he's white
So he's like my competition, I mean, right?
Nope! Paul Wall is dope, and so is Bubba
So bu-bu-bu-bu-bu-bu-bu-bu-but, I don't compete with nobody
I just go hard, do the rope-a-dope Ali shuffle
And dance around my opponents, do donuts
Sometimes I play possum, like I'm asleep, it's awesome
I'm like a sleepin' giant, and when I awake I'm like Dre
I just jump from outta nowhere and bite prey
And sink my teeth in 'em, and fill 'em
Full of poison, and make a noise like a snake before I kill 'em
And let 'em know that I just don't feel 'em
And smack 'em with the backward E, the Eminem emblem
I was taught if you gonna murder somebody you should face him
Tell him why, look him dead in the eye, then waste him
And the dark shall emerge from the fiery depths of hell
Then swallow the shell, all the hollow who dwell
In the shadows of all who are willing to sell their souls
For this rap game and it g-g-goes
One-two-three, chk-chk, one-two-three
Chk-chk, one-two-three, that ain't the hook, now follow me
There's nothing else for me to say, my public adores me
Everybody bores me, they're just so corny
So at night before I sleep, I look in the mirror
The mirror grows lips and it whispers: "Come nearer"
[Chorus]
My darling, I don't ever want you to leave me, my darling
You and me were meant to be together, my darling
And if I cannot have you, no one can, you're my darling
'Cause I possess your soul, your mind, your heart and your body
I don't ever want you to leave me, my darling
You and me were meant to be together, my darling
And if I cannot have you, no one can, you're my darling
'Cause I possess your soul, your mind, your heart and your body
[Verse 2]
"Shady, I know you're in there somewhere, come here
Talk to me, sit! Here, pull up a chair
Why don't you cut your hair?
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Dye it back, come on, try it"
Ahh, no! I told you, leave me the fuck alone, will you?
"But I'm here to rebuild you," — but I already killed you
"But Shady, we were meant for each other
Think about your mother," — yeah, so what of her?
"You think about what she did to you and your little brother
All them foster homes," — fuck you, motherfucker!
I had you beat! — "No, I was playin' possum
Remember? I let you watch your little girls blossom
I gave you enough time, your soul's mine
I'm taking it back," — you fuckin' bitch, why?!
"Because I love you, look a little closer
Isn't that us on that poster? Ha-ha-ha-ha"
[Chorus]
My darling, I don't ever want you to leave me, my darling
You and me were meant to be together, my darling
And if I cannot have you, no one can, you're my darling
'Cause I possess your soul, your mind, your heart and your body
I don't ever want you to leave me, my darling
You and me were meant to be together, my darling
And if I cannot have you, no one can, you're my darling
‘Cause I possess your soul, your mind, your heart and your body
[Verse 3]
"Shady, listen! (Shady!) You hear that?
They're screaming for you, I can bring your career back!"
But I don't want it back — "Yes, you do," — no, I don't
"Yes, you do! You're gonna regret it later," — no, I won't
"I'ma get Dre on the phone, I'll just call the Doctor"
Go ahead, I already talked to Dre yesterday
"Well, I got him on the phone right now!"
You're lying! (Yo, Slim!) How, why now?
What up, Dre? (Check this out, Slim, I gotta talk to you
I don't know, it just seems like ever since you got off your
Drugs you became a lot softer)
But Dre, all Shady is, is a bottle of hair bleach and vodka
(Well, just think about it, Slim, I'm here
Just hit me back and let me know what's up) — fuck this mirror!
"I'm not in the mirror, I'm inside you, let me guide you"
Fuck you! Die, you son of a bitch!
"Put the gun down!" — bye-bye! Boom!
Okay, I'm still alive, — "So am I too!
You can't kill a spirit even if you tried to
Ha-ha, you sold your soul to me, need I remind you?
You remember that night you
Prayed to God you'd give anything to get a record deal? Well, Dre signed you
This is what you wanted your whole life, Marshall, right? Ooh
Look at this house, look at these cars: they're so nice, woo!
Oh, but you didn't know fame has a price too?
That you just now seeing the downside to
Lose your best friend from high school, your wife too
Ain't even sure if your kids like you
Come off tour, can't even sleep at night without NyQuil
Become a Valium addict, start a rehab cycle
But together we can break the cycle
Marshall…" — What?! — "No one's gonna love you like I do" *Chainsaw starting up*
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