Satellite

We learned to stop staring at the floor
We learned to stop hoping it would offer us our guidance anymore
There was a turn before you froze
We all knew it was something when
Everyone was backing up
(I know it won't matter, I won't keep bringing it up)
So we'll sit in silence once more
So we offered silent answers
(open so, as you're breaking up)
Kept to myself and you kept to yourself
And we hoped one another could not keep it up

Moving across the hall

I said I'd call
There was no answer
There was no reason
Wandered off from the back yard
There were no answers to anything we called

I waited for you before we went in
And you said
Slept at your desk and you slept in your closet
You got rid of everything but it wasn't working
Fled into turning to seek rolling over
There's no reason to think that anything was happening
But it still feels like we're falling forever
And even in dreams
There're still some things that we can't make up
Said it really happens if you don't wake up

Thought if you concentrated hard enough you could control
The governing circumstances keeping you grounded
You tried but you couldn't control anything

And there's no reason we set there
On the grass that never grew
Feigning interest in alien things
So at least we had something to say
Answering between clarity
So at least we had some place to stray

Wait on headlights when you're coming over,
Still worried it won't go away
And all we had as we waited there
Was waiting there

Promise me you'll never bother
Asking me what I'm thinking when you know
You know there's nothing to say
You'll know what it is anyway
Entirely something else than when you're alone

Maybe it was something we didn't want to know
Maybe it earned its place hidden under us all
All the time trying to give meaning undue
All the time on each other neither one of us knew

Feels like we've been falling forever like a satellite
Set floating there in orthogonal orbit

Learned to stop commiserating
Learned to stop equivocating
Learned to rely on our relying on anaphora
With "haiku-like imagination"
Almost missed the view from the window

Woke up at midnight, headlights rolling over
Said there was something so important that it couldn't wait
Said you were watching but you couldn't shoulder it now

We learned to stop staring at the door
We learned to stop wondering if we could still escape it anymore

Everyone saw, I know, I know
The blank frames on your book shelf
Everyone felt better then
(I won't, I won't)
There was a place we both said we'd meet if we fall too far apart
So we sit still staring at the floor
So we sit still hoping that we'll actually do what we learned we should do
And that either of us will find someplace to start