Eminem Speaks

[Spoken Word: Eminem]

I think once I took my first Vicodin, it was just like, this feeling of, "Ahh"

You know, like everything was not only mellow, but didn't feel any pain

It just didn't–, it just kind of numbed things

I don't know at what point exactly it started to be a problem

I just remember likin' it more and more

People tried to tell me that I had a problem

I would say, "Get that fuckin' person out of here, I can't believe they said that shit to me, they know nothin' about my fuckin' life, are they out of their fuckin' mind?"

I'm not out there shootin' heroin, I'm not out there fuckin', you know, puttin' coke up my nosе, I'm not smokin' crack

You're struggling with the argument of "Do you havе a problem, or do you not have a problem? Can you control it, or can you not?"

And I literally thought I could control it

You're taking things that people are giving you that, you don't even know what the fuck they are

They look like a pill, and they look– they're shaped like something that you take, so you take it, you know?

Xanax, Valium, tomato-tomato

You know what I mean? It's th-the same thing, it's all in the same family, fuck it, take it

Had I had got to the hospital about two hours later, I would've died

My organs were shutting down, my liver, kidneys, everything

They were gonna have to put me on dialysis, they didn't think I was gonna make it

My bottom was gonna be death, within a month, I had relapsed

And shot right back up to the same amount of pills that I was taking

I remember just walking around my house and thinking every single day, like, "I'm gonna fucking die," like, I'm-I'm looking at my kids, and I need to be here for this

Coming off of everything, I literally was up twenty-four hours a day for three weeks straight

And I mean not sleeping, not even nodding off for a fucking minute

Like, I was literally just up, like, looking at the TV

I had to regain motor skills, I had to regain talking skills

It's been a-a learning process, like, it's been, I'm growing

I just couldn't believe that anybody could ever be naturally happy, or naturally function, or be just enjoying life in general, without being on something

So, I would say that t-to anybody that i-it does get better, you know? It just–, it does