Nerves

I don't know where to turn
You'd think by now I'd learn

I don't know where to turn
You'd think by now I'd learn
Got blisters on my fingers from this money that I burn
But I don't show concern
I'll party 'til it hurts
They all want somethin' from you, but won't love you in return

It's been fuckin' with my nerves
You'd think by now I'd learn
Got blisters on my fingers from this money that I burn
But I don't show concern
I'll party 'til it hurts
They all want somethin' from you, but won't love you in return
It's been fuckin' with my nerves

Lifestyles of the rich and famous
I used to pray one day I'd make it
Then I did, and it ain't been the same since
I've been trippin', I've been goin' through phases
I look around, and I don't see the same faces
Yeah, I feel so close, I can taste it
Impatient, wasted, anxious, I hate this

You ain't got a lot a kickin'
So you should probably mind yo' business
Starin' at the clock when the time keeps tickin'
At the free throw line, nigga shot long distance

People say I'm narcissistic
The thing is I don't have to play the part, I live this
I really had to make some hard decisions
And I won't ever do it if my heart's not in it

That's the shit that I'm used to though
Pedal to the metal 'til I lose control
All I'm tryin' to do is improve and grow
Until I'm on stage at the Super Bowl

My back's still crawlin' with demons
Plug my ears, and I try not to hear them
I don't even recognise the guy in the mirror
I ask myself like, "Why am I here?"

I don't know where to turn
You'd think by now I'd learn
Got blisters on my fingers from this money that I burn
But I don't show concern
I'll party 'til it hurts
They all want somethin' from you, but won't love you in return

It's been fuckin' with my nerves
You'd think by now I'd learn
Got blisters on my fingers from this money that I burn
But I don't show concern
I'll party 'til it hurts
They all want somethin' from you, but won't love you in return
It's been fuckin' with my nerves

Sometimes I don't really want to know the truth
I'm just doin' what I'm supposed to do
Never showin' on the surface what I'm goin' through
I need a fresh start, and it's overdue
Every single line isn't quotable
Gotta manifest it all, or it won't come true
So let me get a toast to this ocean view

Who woulda thought that I'd be livin' like this?
Now every single song is a hit I don't miss
Someone pass the toilet paper, man, I've been on my shit
I'm sick, stay away from me, I'm still at high risk
You start to notice as the narrative changed
While they still sleepin' on me, they barely awake
I got my city on my back, I gotta carry the weight
So if I'm orderin' the steak, then I'm sharin' my plate

And I don't really get time for the guys
'Cause I got these problems I'm tryin' to conquer
I do this for the people in line at my concerts
You're now witnessin' the mind of a monster
So I can't pay attention to the fuckery
I was lookin' for somethin' that was right there in front of me
Right now, I'm tryin' to work on my recovery
But suddenly, they all want to treat me like a somebody

What can I say, man? The irony is real
I'm fully independent, I won't sign another deal
My eyes are runnin' kill, and I'm firin' at will
I'm the fireman, everybody line up for the drill
I had a lot of issues I was tryin' to conceal
You aspired to be rich, I aspire to be real
I'm lucky 'cause I still got desire in me still
And the drive's still there, but the drive's uphill

I don't know where to turn
You'd think by now I'd learn
I don't know where to turn
You'd think by now I'd learn