Don't Go In The Basement

Oh!

You can tell a dirty story in the old conservatory

But don't go in the basement

You can make a scene on the mezzanine

But don't go in the basement

You can fill yourself with static with the ghosts up in the attic

But don't go in the basement

You can light yourself a torch on the old front porch

But don't go in the basement!

Oh, you may think, that it's real cool

To ride down the banister like some darn fool

Oh, don't, don't, don't, don't

Don't go in the basement

Hey!

You can feel quite aloof playing rummy on the roof

But don't go in the basement

Where the cockroaches dance you can wallow in romance

But don't go in the basement!

You may think that it's deluxe

To ride the elevator filled with ducks

Oh don't, don't, don't, don't

Don't go in the basement

Uh-uh!