Curriculum Vitae

(Spoken)

Konichiwa Records Headquarters

What are you, stupid?

I told you no eating in my jacuzzi

What's wrong with you?

Yeah, get me studio one

Listen, I want some rain, thunder and some hells bells, alright?

Just tell him to stick to the script, ok?

Do it

Listen

You can not stop this

You can not escape it and you can't turn it off

So I'd appreciate your kind consideration in this matter

Sir or Mam would you please turn it the fuck up

Do it

I present to you

Unleashed in the east

Best dressed in the west

Sorted in the north

Without a doubt in the south

The queen of queenbees

Lioness of Juda

Phoenix from the ashes risen

Undefeated, undisputed, featherweight champion

On all five continents

World record holder with a high score of two gazillion in Tetris

Two-time recipient of the Nobel prize for super foxiest female ever

And war time consigliere to the Cosa Nostra

She split the atom, invented the x-ray, the cure for AIDS, and the surprise blindfold greeting

She performed and choreographed the fights for Bruce Lee in Enter the Dragon

And Game of Death and still does stunt doubles for Jackie Chan on the weekends

She suckerpunched Einstein, outsmarted Ali, and even outsuperfreaked Rick James

She's the founder and CEO of Konichiwa Records

The most decorated professional field operative in the industry and in the streets

With a perfect track record since kindergarden where she used to whoop schoolboy ass

She's listed in section 202 of the United Nations Security Act of 1979

As being too hot to wear tight sweaters on international airspace

In this world of tension, pressure and pain

She is known by men and women of all origin and faith

For her wisdom, compassion, and relentless

Determination in the quest to get paid